#VanLife influencer disappears and boyfriend refuses to talk to police

Originally published at: #VanLife influencer disappears and boyfriend refuses to talk to police | Boing Boing

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Staying silent, simply because he qualifies as perhaps the first person law enforcement might look at in such circumstances, is disgusting behaviour, given that someone has disappeared.

If he is innocent of any wrongdoing, whatever he knows he should tell police. Silence gives a strong impression of something to hide and his lawyer has now guaranteed that he will be the first person they look at.


I wonder how long Mr. Hipster Aspirational Vanlife thinks he can keep this up. As we’ve seen with other “influencers”, having lots of social media followers gives certain types of people a feeling of freedom from consequences they really don’t have.

Also, I don’t care how much you love a person – being cooped up in an “itty-bitty van” with them for more than half of each day (sometimes including driving down the byways of Idiot America) for months on end is guaranteed to inspire murderous thoughts at the very least.


Yeah… ugh…

It strongly suggests he knows enough to expect her to be found dead if at all.


No! Using your right to silence is not a dick move- it’s the best thing you can do if you want to remain free and not unfairly convicted of something you didn’t do.

The perception that “only guilty people use their rights” is a stupid notion that police rely on to violate every right you have.


From a legal standpoint, his safest move is keep his mouth shut to let his attorney do the talking. That being said, if he had reason to believe that she was alive and well when last he saw her, then it would probably be in his best interests to have his attorney disseminate selected information to that effect.


I disagree. It is a dick move if you are innocent of any wrongdoing and want to help find your missing friend. Clearly one or the other is not true here (or both - in which case it may not be a dick move from an entirely selfish perspective, but remains a dick move from her family’s perspective).


I fully agree as far as the cops are concerned – the Miranda warning is a good thing before taking into consideration the abusive behaviour of American police departments. But not telling her family about the circumstances and basic details of their separation after nothing has been heard from her was a dick move, one that has now attracted the attention of the authorities.


And yet, for YEARS AND YEARS, here and in lots of other places, the advice from the EFF, ACLU, and every lawyer-adjacent dude with an internet connection is “DO NOT TALK TO THE COPS. PERIOD.” Even if you’re innocent. Especially if you’re innocent. Misstatements can be made to look like obstruction. Accidental omission can look like concealment. Your only statement to the police should be “I am declining to make any statement without my attorney present.” Saying nothing is your protected right. Saying anything opens exposes you to (possibly criminal) liability. Even if it makes you look guilty, lawyer up and take that lawyer’s advice.

That’s the message that’s been put out time and time again. And generally, it’s correct!

But, you know, a pretty white chick is missing, so THIS time, help 'em out.


The guy’s white too though. So why bring that up? Not like there’s any shortage of white guys being defended heavily when DV comes up.

Also usually the point of bringing up white women being cared about in the media is to bring attention to the not-white women who also are victimized and then get ignored… Not to dismiss any concern for any women. What is this #nowomenslivesmatter or something?

He had time before a police investigation started. The fact that he had to do this means whether he murdered her or not she’s most likely dead and he’s keeping/kept any knowledge of her welfare from her family because it might implicate him. We can feel however we want about that.


This has nothing to do with ‘pretty white chick is missing’. (The only pic I have ever seen of her was the one in this post. I would otherwise not even have known she was white.) Admittedly I am from UK, where things are not (yet, quite) as bad re talking to the cops. But in these circumstances his silence makes things look very much worse for him. And he has an attorney and so is very able to make a statement with his attorney present. The cops are now likely to go balls out to prove it was him, if anything can be shown to have happened to her. He had a chance to head that off.

In the UK the right to silence is accompanied by this warning:

You do not have to say anything. But, it may harm your defence if you do not mention when questioned something which you later rely on in court.

This is a key element of an arrested person’s chat with their lawyer. ‘This is my position/explanation/comment - will it hurt me if this goes to court, if I say nothing about it now?’

I do not know if this warning also applies in the US but either way his lawyer ought to be considering it, right now.


I hope that she is safe, but there we go again.


There is a third possbility. She ran away from her family and wants to avoid them finding out were she is. Not likely, but still a possibilty.


Yes, that did cross my mind, but seems very unlikely - and in which case, he might know this and be able to tell them, or if he does not, could tell the cops how and where she ran away. (When he last saw her.)


It sucks to be a woman. Misogyny sucks.


If I saw Vladimir Putin kill a bald eagle, I wouldn’t tell police. Or maybe I would tell them I saw Bezos do it.


It does not in the US. You have an absolute right to remain silent here.


I think people are upset because he has an attorney. No one is suggesting he talk to police without his attorney, if he wishes to exercise his rights.

Although I’m pretty sure that if my partner went missing, I’d be out of my mind enough to forget all advice about talking to police. ‘Cause I’d want her to be found.