Vikings didn't invent those iconic horned helmets and probably never wore them

That’s typical of the disjoint between museums and their gift shops. In many natural history museums you’ll learn that many iconic dinosaurs such as Tyrannosaurus and Stegosaurus lived millions of years apart. And yet you can often buy posters or toys in the gift shop that show them living/fighting together.

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I remember when a Treasures of Egypt exhibition was touring, before the 2011 revolution (oh Gods, was that more than a decade ago now?)

I know it was then because after passing through the (wonderful, even if the info cards were terse to the point of uselessness unless you already knew what you were looking at) exhibits, the gift shop at the exit featured toy costume Pharaoh headdresses, plushy Anubises (which are TBF completely adorable, and we still have the ones we bought), and a large selection of Zahi Hawass branded hats, because Egyptology at the time was basically The Zahi Hawass show, starring Zahi Hawass, directed by Zahi Hawass from a script written by Zahi Hawass.

After the revolution, it seems to be that the main reason Hawass was the face of Egyptology was because Mubarak let him, and without his patron, he lost his ability to make everything about him.

(Footnote: I’m not saying Hawass is a bad Egyptologist, or even that he’s insincere about his evident love and respect of Pharaonic Egypt. Just that he also found a way to turn it into a way to put his face in front of every camera pointed towards an archaeological site or artifact whether he had anything to add or not.)

The book of the exhibition is what you want to get at the gift shop if you want something informative. Everything else is decorative tat. (Sometimes entertaining or amusing tat, but still tat.)

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True, Hawass was deeply embedded into the Mubarak regime and certainly his fortunes faded with the end of it, but despite his egotism he was probably the first world reknowned Egyptologist to actually be, you know, an Egyptian, so he left at least some positive legacy in showing that was possible.

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I always enjoy your detailed and knowledgeable posts. But you could just stop the analysis here:

Can you imagine how freaking awesome wearing a horned helmet would be. Probably impractical as hell. But so boss!

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They are used to disappointment between NYC and Albany.

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Came here for that. Was not disappointed.

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Which reminds me, didn’t they drink out of horns?

Maybe the horned helmet was a special occasion type of headwear, like this:

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Wrong Vikings.

Football Sport GIF by Minnesota Vikings

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There’s a reason they’re popular in things like cosplay and Ren Faires.

And they did exist obviously. It’s just the Norse don’t seem to have actually used them. And with a couple exceptions no one seems to have worn them while fighting.

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I guess we’ll never know if those style of helmets were common in 900 BC, or if the only two joke-novelty prototypes were “accidentally” lost in the bog.

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s-l400

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