Waitress receives tip: God wants you to go home and cook

Not only did they use “you’re” in place of “your”, they used “your” in place of “you’re” in the very next sentence!!

Two wrongs don’t make a right, but here two wrongs apparently make a right-winger.


But the effort is part of what made the Watley person feel so proud of themselves. I’d bet they bragged at church about it, and think it was some kind of ministry.


Man. I’m constantly surprised how people in this country fail to understand that labor is performed in exchange for money. Yes, even labor you don’t hold in high regard.


In a more perfect world, EITHER

Workers are paid fair wages for their time, and tipping is not a thing.


Restaurants have a shared directory of holier-than-thou tightwad D-bags like the Watleys, and every waiter recognizes them on sight.


There’s a reason it’s called “Cracker Barrel.”


It’s pernicious, and leads to bullshit like the Hobby Lobby decision, or WalMart managers asking why a person needs a raise, what do they need the money for (true story from a friend of mine).



Ah, the Deppenapostroph.


Shame about the pan, though. Just use a rock, they don’t dent as easily


Yeah, I’m still skeptical. It just seems too over the top. I totally believed these stories at first:


You need to spend more time in the customer service field. For some people, no amount of effort should be spared telling you how bad you are at your job. All in an effort to “help,” so when you tell them to fuck right off they can get fully offended at your spurning of their assistance.


That one (that you linked) seemed over the top to me also, so I do understand where you are coming from.

I’ve supported myself waiting tables in the bible belt, but am gratefully not doing that any more. I never received a note that long, but I received a fair number of asshole “tips” and admonitions to get married and get with the baby making. I’m not saying it isn’t a hoax, but it has the ring of truth. Even the terrible apostrophe usage and you/you’re confusion is consistent with my experience in the rural midwest.


I stopped going there a long time ago. I love their chicken fried steak but their hiring policies and how they treated non-white customers for a while in the 90’s and early 2000’s made me vow to never go in there again. I think it’s nice they settled their lawsuit and whatnot but I’m fine with my decision.


I feel like we need a version of the “Falsehoods Programmers Believe…” for Conservatives. That would be such a long list though.

Examples to include:

All women exist to be wives and mothers.

All working women are married or hope to be.

God exists and he agrees with every thought you think, no matter how fucked up or narcissistic or self-serving it may be.

Donald Trump is the best presidential candidate running for the office this year.


So now “hopes and prayers” will not only stop bullets, they will take care of income shortfalls.


I tend to think this is not a hoax. I’ve met people on personal “missions” to fix the world’s problems with earnest advice like this. One drove a battered car papered end to end with proselytizing stickers. I wouldn’t be surprised if The Watleys (probably just one Watley) wrote this out in advance and added the server’s name at the moment of delivery.

By the way, reversing your/you’re and their/they’re isn’t uncommon. I suspect the writer knows there’s a difference but gets it backward.


It’s funny how when you write something off, it sticks with you, even after it might not apply. Every time I buy grapes, I have to remind myself that UVAS NO was a long time ago, and I don’t have to avoid grapes in solidarity with Cesar Chavez.

But I still won’t go to Denny’s or Cracker Barrel as long as there is literally anything else to eat.


There is one place where “your” is used correctly, which I can only assume was an accident.


An only slightly more tolerable chain than its direct competitor, “Deplorables Basket”


I wouldn’t bet that the napkin was penned by a man. This smacks of Mean Girl: Religious Edition. Especially the part with the imagined husband having an imagined affair due to the waitress’ imagined shortcomings as an imagined wife.

@cleveremi: I didn’t wait tables, I worked retail in Iowa to pay rent at uni. One fine Sunday morning, an old lady came through my checkout line and admonished me for working on Sunday. I put a smile on and said, “but maam, you’re shopping on Sunday.” Then wished her good day as she walked out of the store looking pretty foul. She didn’t complain to management, though, so I’ll give her that. I don’t think I’ll never forget that old hypocrite.