Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2019/11/26/what-it-takes-to-become-qualif.html
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I heard it’s like a game of chess.
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Something, something, snatch the pebble from my hand?
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Beat your dad in a fight?
No, that’s Jedi…
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The online course from Trump University got me my certificate in three months, but it will take about eleven years to pay off my student loans.
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It usually takes 11 years, but the BoingBoing store had it for 95% off, so I got mine in just 6 months.
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My secret weapon is the “hug”, my Son taught this to me, an ancient art when he was just a young lad, he is a master of “two dragons, one house”.
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Interesting review of this BBC video by someone who spent time training there:
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And listen to the grasshopper at your feet.
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It’s fascinating to see something like this that’s rooted in a martial art but has evolved over so much time to be something else entirely-- keeping the guise of “fighting” while being almost wholly ritual/performative.
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you beat me to it.
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“You must learn patience Ed Gruberman.”
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I was going to add a tasteless and unnecessary reference to auto-erotic asphyxiation, but I thought better of it. 
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A hundred men they’ll test today
(yeah, I’m really that old, and yeah, I’m going there)
Only three win the green beret
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I enjoyed his calling bullshit frequently
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Saw this some months ago. Agree. Also:
We have been part of Shaolindo kungfu school in south Austin for years.
These documentaries tend to ladle on the mystique.
Mostly it’s a lot of repetition and hard work, and getting bruised and sore a lot. Sometimes someone (even our teacher!) will cut his own foot open when teaching edged weapons like the guandao even if the edge is not sharpened. Ooopsie.
Thanks for posting this.
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And yet, here we are. You, me.
And this belt.
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Actually in China, it’s more the opposite. I never met any parent who did not pay at one point their kid teachers.
It usually takes 11 years, but by paying extra money, I go mine in just in 6 months.
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