UPDATE 5/29: The scandal has been revealed as sexual abuse of a minor. May this horrible man face justice for his crimes and may his victim(s) find the peace they deserve.
Breaking news: Former House Speaker Dennis Hastert was just indicted on charges of lying to Federal officials over $3.5 million he paid to an undisclosed party as hush money to cover up “past misconduct.”
While the juicy details are almost certain to come out soon, I thought this might be a fun time to lay down (figurative) money on What’s Denny Hiding?
Here’s a quick summary:
- Former coach
- House speaker from 1999-2007
- Generally anti-regulation
- Supported Constitutional amendment to ban same-sex marriage
- A 2005 Vanity Fair article alleges Turkish spies boasted of covert relations with Hastert, supposedly paying him for sensitive information and cooperation
- Suspiciously withdrew his support for the Armenian Genocide resolution in 2000, allegedly after getting a $500,000 payout from the Turkish consulate
- Nabbed a highly-paid lobbying gig within six months of resigning from Congress
Anyone want to lay down their bets? The usual suspects would be:
- Gay sex scandal
- Fathered Illegitimate child
- Paedophile (abused kids during his time as coach)
- Hookers, hookers, hookers
- Took bribes from corporate interests
- Took bribes from foreign powers
- Took bribes from everybody
- Paid to cover up a juvenile criminal record
- Drug addiction
- Domestic abuse
- Killed somebody
Note: I’d put this in the form of a survey but I’m not sure how to make one.