What's the *worst* movie you've ever seen?

Good news!

JJ Abrams is busy on Star Wars, so Star Trek III will be directed by some guy you’ve never heard of

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I share your opinion of Dog Soldiers and mostly love The Descent. I haven’t been able to track down Doomsday, but man, did Centurion suck.

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Hey, cool! Maybe he’ll bring along some of that Space Jam 2 storytelling magic!

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I admit, I didn’t get around to Centurion. I can usually tell when bad reviews are the kind of bad that mean I won’t enjoy something.

If you do manage to dig up Doomsday, keep in mind that it’s essentially Badass Dragons of a Scottish Wasteland. With appropriately managed expectations, an excellent time may be had.

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Okay, see this is where I differ weirdly. I think that it was a great movie. It’s just not a Star Trek movie. It was a great Space Invaders movie. It was a phenomenal Galaga movie. It would have even made an awesome Galaxian movie. It’s possible that I might just be telling myself that because I forgot to take it back to the RedBox and now I own it.

I liked the score though.

I’m really hopeful that Commander Worf will succeed. If you had told me that anyone other than Michael Dorn would be Worf, I’d shove you out an airlock. But as it stands, it will be nice to have something under the control of actual Trek alumni.

I always love watching bad movies with pedantic nerds. Seriously, the post-mortem is the best part.

They needed pattern enhancers to teleport into a remotely dusty room in half of the episodes of fucking DS-9! Alternate timeline or not, that’s still a century after the Kirk timeline. There is no reason they should have that kind of tech.

Aaaand, that’s officially the nerdiest thing I’ve typed today.

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Every time I watch a movie, I always measure it against Random Hearts, which I think is the worst movie ever. The only time I saw it, I wanted to pull out my hair and poke my eyes out.

Not a Fast and Furious fan? :wink:

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League… omg, it was so bad it was just bad.

Two others that are in my top ten worst:
Tomb Raider (2? I don’t fucking know and I don’t fucking want to remember)
Event horizon

Both studies in how to make a plot that could be i treating, fun, or engaging, and projectile vom all over it.

(Oh brother is one of my favs :D)

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why no. no, I am not.

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Why?! Was the terribleness of the film just not enough that you had to come back for more? For kicks? Did you hope the extras would redeem the crapfest that I even knew as a kid (who truly enjoyed The Gnome-Mobile and Witch Mountain movies) was a terrible, disappointing movie?

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The thing is, I liked ST:2009.

It wasn’t exactly Star Trek at its best, but it was, at least, fun. I figured at the time that they needed to make an entertaining movie after the last two flops, and, since origin stories are tricky and often boring, I gave them a lot of leeway for the reboot. The sequel would have to bring back the spirit of Trek, now that they had re-launched the franchise.

And then the sequel did nothing of the sort. It, as you said, strip-mined the franchise for its darkest bits, twisting the message of those dark bits from, “We will always have a dark side, and the temptation will always be there to let the end justify the means — but we can be better than that, and can achieve true civilization if we take these higher path,” to “humanity is a bunch of assholes and we’ll never rise above that.”

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LXG? So bad, it ended Sean Connery’s career.

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This thread reminded me of an excellent diatribe Kevin Smith did about Superman and Wild Wild West.

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Sadly none of my movie-watching friends are quite historical-nerdy enough to warrant making them sit through this one:

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I kinda liked Event Horizon. I haven’t really been motivated to watch it a second time, but back then I thought it was fun and atmospheric. For a given value of “fun.”

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Gotta go with a classic for “so bad it’s entertaining” category…

For “that’s 2 hours of my life I can’t get back” it’s a tie between…

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/H._G._Wells’_The_Shape_of_Things_to_Come

and…

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Howard the Duck was the early sign that there was a chink in the Lucas armor. Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom was really just another warning sign of things to come. Then this happened, and while it’s not the absolute worst movie I’ve seen, it was in many ways the most existentially painful, and deserves mention in a list of cinematic abominations:

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Yes, I’m actually eating popcorn during this thread! I feel a bad-movie marathon coming up this weekend!

EDIT: Actually, this thread is a very satisfying bad-movie marathon all by itself.

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Ex Machina.

It just hurt so bad watching it. It was almost as if the people who wrote and directed it were completely unfamiliar with cyberpunk, or even near-future sci-fi, read a few wiki articles about it, then started production.

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