You can tell that they tossed it off without much consideration.
Farrar’s bill penalizes masturbatory emissions outside a vagina or a medical facility
Protests could get more interesting if people start masturbating in the hospital lobbies.
Yeah! Does the law specifically say human vagina?
Buh bye, asswipe
You’re my hero today!
(and you got him 6min after he created an account just to post a totally a-hole response, Bravo!)
So… these masturbation license. Are these like a per year thing or a set amount of uses? Asking for a friend.
Fair is fair after all.
Let’s get even more fair. All congressionals when not actively in office actively doing actual work must live in government subsedized section 8 housing on government SNAP funding and are required to take public transit to and from work.
Government lawmaker? You live by the system you legislated into the ground.
Apparently this guy claims to know of the dangers and suggests you “turn to Jesus for all your needs”…
And while I’m not sure exactly how using two hands helps, if it’s God’'s solution maybe it’s worth a try…
found at Christian Nightmares
Who are these people and how do they keep getting voted into power???
At first I rolled my eyes thinking it was a religious BS thing until I realized it this is performance art.
See, the thing is, boys and men and others with outie equipment, ya’ll really should be required to get your junk handled and inspected annually. You do not want testicular cancer or prostate cancer. They’re pretty damn silent, pretty damn painless, and if they spread, you are pretty damn dead. You want a professional giving you an undercarriage inspection at least once a year, because the preventative maintenance is a lot easier and you will hate it a lot less. That’s why Pap smears and hormonal contraceptives get skewered together for us with the innie equipment – cervical cancer is also more or less silent and painless until it is too late.
So while this is a satirical proposal, every single one of you should be demanding parts of this from your health care providers.
You do not want to die of metastasized prostate or testicular cancer. Neither are pretty. Both are incredibly painful. Both take a long time. Both take away your boner long before they take away your life.
Besides, it’s not like we squish your plums between a couple of metal plates. The exams could be a whole lot worse.
God’s masturbation solution is to use both hands? He might be onto something!
I recall a story from a few years ago. IIRC, bestiality is legal in Texas…so long as it’s heterosexual bestiality.
It sounds like she might have missed a trick.
Curse the new 30-day rule that closed this thread!
I’m not sure if this is accidental or incidental, but either way, masterfully done.
Well, that’s just not fair. I propose that men seeking a Viagra prescription shall be subjected to a mammogram in addition to the rectal exam.
Funny thing is, it could actually save some lives. People forget that men get breast cancer too.
Shhhh!!! I’m aware of that (there was a guy in the waiting room last time I went for the torture plates), but looking to preserve the appearance not-medically-necessary.
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