Enquirer? They might have a question. I freely admit a certain sort of person leapt to mind, but that doesn’t mean there might not be a genuine enquiry. If you don’t allow for a genuine protest, then someone has gamed the process. Otherwise, if is one of the other ones, and ‘target’ or ‘victim’ is fine.
Well, bless their hearts.
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“Per my last email” is how I say “can you not read?” And “I’ve been telling you this for weeks” to clients I want to keep.
Sadly absent from the list are “I’m just trying to help” or “I’m just being honest.” Although perhaps that transcends passive-aggressive into gaslighting.
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Kidnapping?
Ah yes, the all purpose Southern “just shut the hell up” but sounds so much nicer. We use that one a lot.
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According to that ‘map’ only about half of Ohio is in the Midwest, and it’s not even clear where the border is because it’s obscured by the label “Northeast 33%”
O_O
Even ‘just for funsies,’ that’s bad graphics.
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I’ve started saying “No offense … well, some offense” and it really helps my kids understand my meaning.
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It’s always one of the other ones.
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It’s another way of saying “i’m special because i’m a sociopath”.
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Yeah, maybe. Or maybe this place is run by assholes.
My experience is more often that the need for thick-skinnedness is because the customers/clients are arseholes.
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A friend from Texas once explained to me that if an elderly southern woman says “bless your heart” to me, I have been savagely burned.
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“We are making an unscheduled crash landing” is pretty annoying to hear at 30,000 feet.
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I also like, sometimes, “help me understand,” as a kind of shorthand for, “what the fuck are you going on about?!?”
It’s nicer.
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Quickly followed by, “ah, I thought you were full of shit. Glad to have confirmation.”
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Gawd, if only we could be so blunt!
I know being passive aggressive is shitty, but I must admit to liking the ones that are basically a subtle way of saying, “well, if you’d read my previous email that you’re responding to…”
Another one we used sometimes, in limited circumstances when other contractors were asking us questions that would’ve been just as easy for them to just look up was, “well, google says…” then the info.
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They’re probably hoping to win this year’s painbow
For annoying co-worker crap, I recently got this gem at 9pm on a Friday night from a colleague who hadn’t responded to weeks worth of emails and hadn’t contributed a single word for said report: “I am not sure what else I can provide for the report”.
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“Could you please provide error bars for the fuckall you contributed? Thanks.”
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My least favorites are “Don’t take this personally…” and “It’s just business.”
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I’m pretty sure they’re just using the colors to denote the region, not as a scale.
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