"Rac(ing) against his own mortality"? Why doesn't he donate his own penis then? It'd be a nice touch, I think. No pun intended.
He needs a human penis.
Sorry, I already made provisions to have mine sent to the Smithsonian.
(Not because it's remarkable in any way, just because I like to mess with the guy who runs the mailroom.)
Oh boy, Phil hates you already, what do you think he'll do after you make that final move?
I hear Rasputin's might be available
He can have mine when he pries it from my cold, dead... no, wait, that came out wrong.
Penis Musume could be a rather unremarkable anime.
I wonder how many times he's had to endure the "Special Delivery!" gag.
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