Badly* behaving children who aren’t your own (or close to you) are annoying as proselytizers. Sort of like indignant people with faux-outrage on comment threads.
I’m sure there’s a chill pill out there somewhere; keep looking for it.
Behaving badly includes all crying, particularly fake crying. The behavior is still bad even if the parent can make an admittedly amusing video about how to distract the stupid* little whiner.
**Children are stupid because their brains aren’t developed. Don’t be confused though, they are smart enough to play dumb, even dumber than they actually are, clever little fucks.
However, that little girl looks to be just about the age where I remember my son finding his new ability to follow instructions very… compelling. May only work during that window.
How does that work? Do you show the crying toddler the birth control, or do you have to wield it in some way? Do all sorts of birth control work equally well at keeping a specific toddler from crying, or is one better than another?
I’m a little confused. I just checked @IanMcLoud 's profile, and I don’t see where you get this from. This is the only post that has a comment from @IanMcLoud that even hints he may not want children. Unless there’s a different @IanMcLoud lurking somewhere in the comments…
Although, “distract them in some way” is generally a very successful method of stopping toddlers from crying when they’re doing this silly “Crying over absolutely nothing” that the child in question appears to be doing in these videos (and I have much experience with from my own toddler)
I don’t think suggesting birth control was a banal comment. The title is “Proven techniques to stop a toddler from crying.”
I know kids well enough to say that they will adapt to whatever “technique” you use. Maybe distracting this kid by asking what noise a farm animal makes will work today, but a week from now, probably not. Kids cry and shit and cause all sorts of grief. They also bring all sorts of joy.
The only way technique that will really stop a toddler from crying is to not have one. If you have, want, or will be getting a toddler, prepare for tears.
Of course, maybe a technique that lasts a day or a week will be a frigging godsend.
I dunno. Might have been useful to see what happened immediately after every sudden cut to black. Teaching your kid to do little tricks, and then having them trot out those tricks when they’re kinda upset? Sure, if it works at all, it might distract from the current problem for a few seconds, or maybe it distracts her long enough to make her completely forget WTF she was so upset about in the first place. The way the video’s edited, we’ll never know.
Still, I can’t help but put myself in her head and think, “Why are you asking me to perform, Daddy? I’m not your goddamned trained pet monkey!”
Before they learn to talk, crying is sometimes their way of saying “Mom, Dad, please check whether I’ve really hurt myself”. If that’s the only way they get attention, then it can evolve into phony, attention-seeking crying.
