WATCH: Fantastic Four as a direct-to-VHS trailer

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Thank you, Doctor-with-head-reflector. Your work here is done.

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A peak viewing experience, on a VHS dub that wasn’t too many generations old. There was Reed Richards, with so much gravitas that the grey in his hair rubbed off on his skin. There was Von Doom, acting out each line of dialog so much he looked like he was voguing. (I expect he was recording them silently for later dubbing, hence the nonstop gesticulation:
"Reed Richards! You [points at him]
have [mimes ‘having’ something in his arms]
five minutes [holds up five fingers, points at wristwatch place on arm]
to [holds up two fingers]
de- [makes a D]
-cide [points at his side]!!")

(Memory becomes weak at this point, but I suppose he would then have to laugh portentiously, with his hands on his hips just like the Jolly Green Giant.)

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