5 massage therapy guns that won't break the bank like Theragun

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2020/02/16/5-massage-therapy-guns-that-wo.html

I love how the “massage therapy guns” are all relentlessly non-sexy industrial looking things, being wielded by extremely ripped beefy half nekkid guys. And the ad copy:

muscle spasms, increases blood flow, and shortens muscle recovery time

up to 2 hours of professional-grade deep-tissue trigger-point massage per charge to ensure you don’t lose power mid-session. (can’t have that…)

Yeah I bet they are selling a ton of these to achy construction workers, cowboys, indian chiefs, sailors, et al


Or conversely any worker at Hunk O Mania in costume as any of those.

You do realize these things feel a bit like a jackhammer, right? And the battery on the better ones lasts something to the tune of 6 hours?

Mind you, when I used one and finally got my shoulder muscles to release, the relief was damned near orgasmic, so there’s that.

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Had a back thing recently, ordered the Kraftgun - super reviews. $369 but … ahem … hammers the competition.

Now delayed - Coronavirus. Oh well I’ll let you know.

I use a cordless jigsaw with some DIY massage heads. Louder but legit than these rigs


I hear the Hitachi Magic Wand is a pretty good cheap massager if you can deal with a cord.

My wife swears by it!


The Boing Boing Shop is so obnoxious those days.
Don’t you want to make a Patreon or something ?

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Save buckets-o-cash and go with the Black & Decker Random Orbit Waxer/Polisher for under $30.

It’s awesome.

I’ve tried many varieties of massage tool, this one wins hands down. My need for such device stems from congenital hip problems that cause issues w/musculature above & below affected hip. Even the worst movement constricting kinks are tamed w/this tool.

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I honestly thought you were fucking with us (in my defense, the subject matter and it being a boingboing shop post do make this likely). But no, this is not just a thing; it’s enough of a thing to have received substantial media coverage.

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I’m glad to see you found others testifying to the truth of the B&D tool - a tool that although designed and built for vehicle beautification is a low-cost top-shelf option for self-applied physical therapy.

It can be a bit tricky for some to use at the outset, but patience and creativity in using the tool are amplely rewarded.

To my mind, it combines the best attributes of a handheld massager with those of foam-rolling. Plus, if you run the tool head flat (fully flush) on a problem body part the rotating head generates a penetrating warmth that can be controlled by applying more or less pressure.

As you can tell, I can’t speak highly enough of the waxer/buffer as an essential massage or PT tool.

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As the adage goes, anything’s a dildo if you’re brave enough.

That’s a new one to me. But in this case, bravery isn’t required. Only a willingness to pay less to get consistently better results.

Well, mine’s arriving tomorrow, so I’ll try it and report back.

Worst case, I can use a polisher for its design purpose.

Best o’ luck with it.

Might I offer some unsolicted advice. Be willing to be creative with how you hold and manipulate it. If you’re hands are avg to big, you might find holding it around motor casing gives excellent leverage at variety of angles. Also, at the outset, turn on after placing head against affected body point. Lastly, people differ as to best use with or without garments such as leggings. I’m firmly in the bare skin camp.

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I assume you’ve never experienced one of these? They aren’t Hitachi Magic Wands. They’re jigsaws with blunt attachments. I’m not saying that no one uses these things for…other reasons, but having used one for back pain, I can only wince at the prospect of directing them at anything more sensitive than a shoulder blade.

Aye. The one I’ve tried out on my shoulder and neck (the BeFit quiet massage gun, in case anyone’s curious), I had to dial way the hell down. At anything over a 3, it felt like I was clutching a jackhammer in my teeth.

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