All the startups Yahoo bought in the last few years, and what happened to them


#1

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#2

Three reflections on this article:

  • Suck it, my boss, who loves to cite Marisssa Mayer’s opposition to people working from home.
  • Reading that many too-cute tech startup names in a row makes me feel like I just ate 10 too many jellybeans.
  • If all this shenanigans takes down Yahoo’s only lasting contribution to the world (Yahoo Answers as fodder for comedians) then truly all has been for naught.

#3

#4

You’d think with her track record that it would be a positive argument for working from home.

I’m fine with taking down “how babby formed?!” but Tumblr is entertaining enough.


#5

I never got that… I used to get so much more done when I telecommuted. When I needed to be doing stuff nobody would complain about Bitches Brew playing on the speakers or some such but oh headphones in the office I am not paying attention or some such. If something came in at 10 minutes to quitting time that would be 40 minutes of work to get started no problem, in the office, yeah it will wait till the morning cause commute is gonna go from suck to OH GOD NOOOO if I take even 10 extra minutes.


#6

She was always going to struggle to resurrect the brand. It has become so uncool that it has long been their major liability. But she really lost me with the story about her “rolling up her sleeves” and personally interfering with the process of “refreshing” (i.e. imperceptibly changing) the logo. Bringing in “high profile celebrities” to improve morale also has me rolling my eyes.


#7

But… all those ask-blogs are on tumblr. I’d be sad if they went away.


#8

I think Mayer’s done exactly what she intended to do when she went there; make herself personally (ridiculously) wealthy. Yahoo! Was! Dying! Regardless!


#9

Oh, I did express a love of Tumblr.

Where else can i stumble across a Gravity Falls / Hannibal TV series crossover? I usually loathe mashups!


#10

I never forgave them for killing off Xobni, my favorite Outlook enhancement.

Also their search sucks. I base this on the fact that they happily served up malware infested versions of VLC to my boss after I suggested he install the media player that plays anything. My next suggestion was “never use Yahoo for anything”.

If you want to compete, Yahoo, you can’t be shitty.


#11

Makes sense, “Yah-hoo, in the ancient tongue means ‘that which brings storms’.”


#12

Not me, boy, it makes me think I better get busy cooking up something to serve the sentient sword. It’s a pretty sweet paycheck.


#13

Yeah, but it’s only one paycheck. How long can that be fun for, after the blow has all been snorted and the hookers have left?


#14

Ask me again next year, bro.


#15

Fourth reflection: isn’t this just more evidence that, whatever the approach is that’s being used to recruit CEOs, it isn’t working? The headhunters don’t seem to have worked out that, just because someone is utterly consumed by greed, doesn’t mean that trickle down to the company will work.


#16

I do wonder how that’s decided upon.

Do shareholder boards REALLY believe that golden parachutes make a better leader?

I wonder who establishes and supports the continued cargo cult behavior. How does the belief that compensation like this encourages “the best” applicants and future of the company?

Or, is the choice just to increase the stock value first and foremost so that the stockholders can cash out before the CEO fucks everything up inevitably. I’m voting that.


#17

Good news everyone, we’ve been bought out!

Bad news. It’s Yahoo.

I interpret ‘bought by yahoo’ as ‘we found a lump.’


#18

Thanks to awesome browser plugins, I’ve found my next startup and/or band name:

Also, I am twelve. :slight_smile:


#19

That took me way too long to grok, but at least I didn’t have to google it.

Fave plugin idea besides “SJW to Skeleton”.


#20

It’s called Cloud To Butt Plus (not sure what the plus is about). I’ve been running it so long that most of the time it doesn’t even register, but every so often it produces a substitution so pitch perfect that it just tickles my funny bone to no end.