Alton Brown hates your dumb kitchen gadgets

Well, not me. My waffle iron plates are two sided, so I flip them over and bingo, sandwich press. #notallwaffleirons

#2 is America’s Best Thing:

I have tried all of the above. There is only one way which doesn’t suck:

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Read that at first as “mac & cheese” and fully approved.

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Doesn’t have to be. You can use it for any ol’ kind of pizza, if you’re determined enough.

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Yes, and I purchased a good, well made, super easy to use (with has relief valve, user replaceable O rings, etc). But it only makes sausage! Anyone less crazy than me, hunters, etc. don’t need one, because they are by definition a unitasker.

Sausage in a casing from a piping bag, not hard. And that costs $0.25 and not $300. Or just make coppa, or mortadella, or black/white puds. But this lovely, wonderful tool is a unitasker :smile:

(Now who wants a banger?)

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A banger in the mouth?

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One time I made a large pizza:

But this other time, I made an extra large. I CALLED IT

#THE UNITASKER

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You can banger me in the ass with some fresh Aeropressed coffee anytime.

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the second image is great - and the manufacturer of this thingy has a wide range of weird contraptions. the machines could play a role in a bad sci-fi movie

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That escalated quickly.

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I don’t want that, I need that.

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Cool story: I approached one of their vp’s via a cold call, just for fun,to see if they’d make a cheese press version.

They said, “…how did you get this number and… Maaaaybe?”

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I protest. These aren’t weird contraptions, they’re for installing conduit, gas lines, etc., without opening a big ass trench.

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Why not both? Weird and useful!

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I tend to discount piping bags for every thing. Since I can’t even get them to work as piping bags. Some one should invent a culinary calk gun. Maybe I could alter a cookie press (though those tend to be awful as well).

that… is an awesome idea…
let me check with a friend

edit

stainless tube with threads on either end, caps with holes cut in them, a removable nozzle like a sausage stuffer, a ‘follower’ that is lathed with a bevel to take a silicone o-ring… but the pushing mechanism?

you could thread it like an apple press, so you don’t need a spring loaded mechanism.

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There are cheap, unreliable versions. The pair I have are the ones listed in the link. They’re made of 18/8 stainless steel, and can hoist a 30 pound bird.