An eye drop guide for wimpy guys like me

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2017/12/18/an-eye-drop-guide-for-wimpy-gu.html

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Eye-drops, chindogu-style:

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That’d rule. Round glasses too!

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I had to use medicated eyedrops daily for several years as a kid and was completely freaked out by anything dripping into my eye like that.

Putting two or three drops in each tear duct along the ridge of my nose and blinking them in worked fine.

But that was in a bathroom. If I had to use them outside, this thing would do the trick.

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Put it in the corner of your eye, tilt your head, squeeze out a few drops.

Came here to say the same. I’m sorry you is to deal with that as a kid. My daughter had some pretty serious issues for a couple of years that nearly took her vision (she’s 95% recovered now). We had 2x daily antibiotic drops and steroid drops. It’s a great technique because you 1) close your eyes so you don’t have to see the dropper and 2) actually gets a better dosage where it belongs as the drops run from inside to out when you blink.

Thanks, luckily I actually didn’t have any eye issues beyond thick glasses – but my ophthalmologist had a wacky theory that using drops to keep one eye constantly dilated for a week, then the other, would “exercise” the eye and improve vision. In reality it just make me look like a tiny nerdy David Bowie or a concussion victim. They had me do it for a couple of years before giving up on that quackery; it became a routine to drip 'em in.

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After some 20+ years of using contacts, I can poke my eyeball without even flinching. Here’s to overcoming ingrained survival instincts!

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I don’t freak out putting in eye drops, I just can’t aim worth a damn. And getting any on the skin around my eyes makes my eyes sting. Fortunately I don’t have to use them that often.

Freaks me out thinking of someone I never met doing it. I seriously can’t even.

One day in my 40s I suddenly flipped from being freaked by anything touching my eyes (drops, finger removing a lash, my opthamologist’s Victorian eye-squeezing equipment) to being completely OK with all of it. I’m not sure what caused the switch.

Just posting to give you hope for the future.

Now, if I could only experience a similar switch for my fear of heights, there are some jobs around the upper reaches of my house I’d like to get to before I turn 70.

I’ve got a few years of 40s left.

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It’s so weird how brains work with things like this.

I used to wear contacts all day long and was very used to fiddling with my eyeballs, but a few years ago I went in for an eye appointment and they put anesthetic drops in my eyes to numb them before, they informed me, poking them with their glaucoma device. I said “sounds great!” and promptly fainted and fell out of the exam chair, which surprised them as much as it did me.

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You ran out of fucks to give in that regard.

Enough gross injuries, and you start to get a sense of perspective maybe?

I’ve pulled a few fish hooks out of me which scraped bone. Also cut myself deeply enough I could see the red muscle fibers in my hand. Came close to poking my eye out once as a teenager as well (several stitches under my eye).

YMMV of course.

Try keeping the eye drops in a front pants pocket so they’re close to body temperature. You may barely notice them go in then.

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My strategy for eye drops involves an index finger below my eye pulling down on the bottom eyelid and the space right below the eye. Then with my head tilted back I roll my eyes upward like I’m trying to peek at my brain then while you only see the whites of my eyes I drip the drips in then with the head still back I look downward with my eyes to get a nice even coat of eye juice on them and blammo, my eyes are lubed up and twice as fast as they used to be.

Honestly though, it took me almost a year to get used to using eye drops when I needed them at one point as a kid. The only reason my strategy worked for me was I could roll my eyes back into my head so I couldn’t see the drops coming even when doing it myself. I just tried putting some eye drops in while looking straight up at the bottle as the drop hung there tormenting me until I blinked as I saw it begin to fall.

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My mileage definitely varied, most of my grossest injuries were while I was a kid. I was heavily into knives, fire, and explosives starting in junior high school, and it is a wonder I am still alive.

That sounds like a really reliable way to fry your retinas one at a time…

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Hah, same. I really wanted contacts as a kid because glasses were inconvenient and always fell off and got stepped on. So I promised mom and dad that I’ll be able to put in contacts and trained myself to withstand sustained eyeball-fondling.

Never happened though. Mom and dad didn’t buy that I was qualified at sticking stuff in my eyes.

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