An important safety reminder about Satan


#1

[Read the post]


#2

Gibson’s Corollary: “The deadliest bullshit is odorless and colorless.”


#3

Silent, but deadly


#4

No, you’re thinking of methylmercaptan.


#5

That’s why it’s so important that you protect your home with Satan Detectors and make sure to check the batteries at least once a month.


#6

Oh, that reminds me. I need to change the batteries in my Satan detectors.

EDIT: Oh, that stinks. I hit reply and typed my message and Brainspore beat me to the joke by seconds.

I wonder what’s to blame for that. Hmmm. Could it be…


#7

Carbon dioxide is natural. It is not harmful. It is part of Earth’s life cycle.
Michele Bachmann aka Satan’s daughter


#8

So, just trying to understand this, Carbon Monoxide is Devil Farts?


#9

Why is it I feel faint and woozy…


#10

" - as is Satan"
I don’t know whether to read that in whispered tone or deadly seriousness.


#11

I dont even know where to start with this one other than, maybe black people should really examine things outside of satan. It is just a word. I tell people it is not a personality, it is a word that means adversary.


#13

Listen to this, and it will be obvious:


#14

I suffered CO poisoning. Luckily I was awake and realised something was amiss when I struggled to stand up. I managed to get outside and call an ambulance. A blood test confirmed the paramedics and doctors suspicions. The first thing the paramedics asked once I described my symptoms was “What kind of heating do you have?”

Then, whilst i was in hospital my landlord entered without permission to fit new vents and replace the ancient gas boiler. He paid cash so no receipts.

Lovely.


#15

The greatest trick Satan ever pulled was draining the batteries in your Satan detector while you were away.


#16

My new band name is Satan Detector.


#17

#18

never pass up a chance to pimp your gig.


#19

I think I’m going to have to add “as is Satan” to as many statements as possible.

“Those pictures of your baby are adorable, as is Satan.”

“That dress is very flattering, as is Satan.”

“I am very disappointed in you, as is Satan.”


#20

Your comment is cynical and misanthropic, as is Satan.


#21

LOL, both already posted so I guess I’ll just leave this here.