[Lazlo continues mangling the unlit cigar with his mouthparts. It’s not quite clear if he’s fussing with it, eating it, or both…]
“Now that’s entirely true. It’s how I manage to keep these cigars so fresh by storing them underneath my own carapace!”
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How charming. There’s a space lizard over there who’s just dying to have a conversation with you about cloaca.
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Pluck
Mission three!!!
Also, shield boosters (b10) +2sh
and cloaking device (b10) +2 st
“wow, Mamma, you good friend. Browf not want to know where you find corduroy trouser, but very good friend.”
1 Like
Unlike Space LIzards, humans do not devour each other, except metaphorically. Rather, we rely on small groups for protection, especially when young.
In terms of r/K selection theory, humans are a “High K” species, while Space Lizards and, apparently, Space Lobsters are a “High r” species.
Rather than carapace, height can serve as crude proxy for maturity in humans. Humans taller than 150 cm are typically “on their own” and are expected to defend themselves. Humans shorter than that are typically under protection of a group. Attempting to eat such a human may trigger the keening wail “Think of the children!”, which has proven lethal to political processes throughout the galaxy.
But be careful: there are ferocious exceptions.
-Falkayn
8 Likes
Dear be-winged space-gods of the ancestral hives, I thought you said copulation. Which is not a bad thing in and of itself.
But in this company?
Too many space-sausages.
On the other wing, no queens.
4 Likes
An open message to our eight indebted ships: Dabohaze, Somewhat Broken Heart, Wildfire, Flying Chemex, HMS Gargle Blaster, Startlingly Improbable, Foil, and Top Hat & Spats
Consider Mission 1.
You can’t afford any mistakes at the moment. Mission 1 is the only mission almost certain to leave you with an almost unscathed ship. It’s also not a bad deal: Mission 1 will clear the debt for about half of you.
I can the understand the impulse to risk it all on mission three in attempt to climb out of debt as quickly as possible. But consider: you will almost certainly come back heavily damaged, with no way to pay for repairs. You will have traded virtual debt stored in some computer somewhere for a real loss where it matters: your ship.
Debt is just a negotiated deal. Anything that can be negotiated can re-negotiated. But damage to your ship is forever .
But I propose something more.
If you owe your banker a thousand pounds, you are at his mercy. If you owe your banker a million pounds, he is at your mercy."
– John Maynard Keynes
The eight of you should organize. Form a Debt collective. Agree to help other. As individual debtors, the strong can pick you off one-by-one. But as a collective, you represent one-fifth of all the known fire power in Charybdis. That’s a force to be reckoned with, and tough one for a debt collector to crack – if your ships are healthy.
Talk it over amongst yourselves, and decide what seems best for you.
“Self-interested cooperation is the basis for all success”
–David Falkayn
Captain, Muddlin’ Through
@SteampunkBanana @DreamboatSkanky @maxd @caffo @zaphodbblx @GlennF @miasm @BradfordBenn
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“what. what is this. browf don’t even…”
“there tiny moose-like beings fighting on red corduroy trouser! why anyone make such trouser!?”
“…”
“… BROWF LOVE THEM!”
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“I ran out to the store, you looked, ah, unbecoming.”
1 Like
Hello fellow captains-
I’m heading out for my delivery mission and I have an, uh, ethical question to ask… Is it OK for me to take a little peek at what’s inside the sealed cargo crates? I’m just so darn curious nosy about what I’m shipping. I’ve never seen a gold hot tub! Or a dog sweater! Or probably anything else those rich snobby folk are having transported…
And it’s not like I’m going to steal anything. Honest!
What say you? Any advice?
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Based on my last trip, I’m not touching nothing on this one.
“you probably not see actual solid gold hot tub or expensive dog sweater. more likely sealed box or crate.”
“ask Mamma Aiuto about sealed crate. you might thINK twice about open. 
”
“Browf still sorry about Mamma’s payoff. Browf not get anything tradeworthy either, all good stuff turn into sabotage android.”
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Absolutely not.
You take a prybar to have a peek at cargo, and you risk losing you Common Carrier license.
Reputable businessmen only book with reputable, and thus licensed, common carriers.
Now, as a life-long shipper, I learned from my father and his father about the trade of shipping, and one thing for certain, you need to know where the center mass is in order to properly secure your cargo.
Acceding to the speculation of privacy violation that pry-bar peeks may enable, the Eclectic Ferrymen Foundation (EFF) lobbied for the right of all common carriers to use alternative technologies in order to properly ascertain the central mass of one’s haul.
I myself prefer this little number from Halliburton Galaxies. Tells me exactly what I need to know.
hat tip
8 Likes
“Common Carrier licence mean no free culture licence: contents not ‘free’. even when cargo actual cultures, which gross.”
“BY symbol represent who send package.”
“NC symbol mean NO CONTRABAND”
“ND show fine for NO DELIVERY: Two Space Bits”
“Common Carrier very serious. You no kid around with CC.”
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Hat: None
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Oh my stars! Thanks for the warning!
I guess I’ll have to put a lid on my nosiness, because if I do something stupid and lose my Common Carrier license, the ConGypsCo Board of Directors will call for my ouster!
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What happens on your ship stays on your ship.
Assuming you have a good crew.
-Falkayn
2 Likes
Opening cargo out of curiosity…
How silly.
It’s not just your license. Any sensible client would lock and boobytrap cargo from the hatless masses. What that boobytrap entails, be it electricity, poison, or acid spitting parasites is up for your crew to enjoy. I hope you brought a few extra in cold sleep.
Well, unless you like that sort of chaos on your deck.
Oh, yawn. I shall either be gritty, and eventually return triumphant with a hat, or I shall explode, and that will be magnificent fun.
6 Likes
Natasha not even in debt and make choice for Mission 1 because not want to pay usurious interest rate to Unizone toadies of bourgeois.
Natasha, however, make offer to make simple loan for mission costs to Captains of indebted ships, for just half of rate demanded by Unizone.
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