Better living thru genetic surveillance: Italian province uses DNA to levy dog poo fines

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40,000 DNA registrations, a data system/service to hold and search them all, and manpower to search for, collect and sample every unclaimed defecation (my dog produces two or three a day.). That’s a lot of paid tests. I wonder what their stray animal situation is? Does their dog poop problem cost a half-million dollars or more, annually?

I wonder if they realize their samples don’t match, they’ve legally cleared all of their suspects?


In Paris in the '90s they used big green dirt-bikes equipped with a giant tank on the back and a hoover nozzle resembling an elephant’s trunk up near the front fork.

The operator (who was dressed like Super Mario only in bright green) would bounce the contraption up onto the sidewalk, pull up alongside the intended target, lower the nozzle onto the dog-poop and with exactly the Schlooooop-Pop! noise you’re imagining, the problem would be solved.

People think Luc Besson movies are science-fiction, but that’s just what Paris is like…


annoying neighbour with dog? frame them.

  1. collect poo of neighbours dog
  2. place poo on steps of the city hall
  3. gleefully watch for neighbour to find the fine in mail box
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I don’t want some bureaucrat breaking the news to my pupper that we aren’t biological family. That’s a conversation I want to have when I’m ready, and I believe that he’s ready.


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