Burglar surprised to discover the lady he's robbing is an armed ax-throwing champ


The former ax-throwing competitor grabbed the weapon she keeps by her side at all times.

That’s some dedication to your craft. I mean, I’m a graphic designer but I don’t keep my favorite pencil at my side at all times.


This was pretty much why I wish my wife had let me buy that chainsaw at that yard sale. A man’s gotta be able to protect his home.

I’m thinking now all I really need is something that sounds exactly like a chainsaw starting up.


You could say she axed him to leave.


How un-American not to kill him needlessly.


She probably did not want to clean up all the blood.

I can already hear the enthousiastic comment from the National Axe Association spokesman !


What a great story. Woman finds burglar in home, does virtually nothing about it, but she ‘could’ have thrown an axe at him.

“If you’re in my house, you’re not walking out.” Except that the burglars did.

At least we now know that she sleeps with her cat and that her daughter is mates with burglars who try to remove watches from sleeping women while munching on sandwiches and soda.

Sounds legit.

Suppose that axe had been a gun.

Axes don’t kill people. Axes fly.

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Except chase him off, pretty much the best-case scenario if you find a burglar in your house. What, you want she should chop him into bits and hang his head over the doorway as a warning to others?


You’re missing my point. I’m illustrating that this is a non-story. Nice accusation though.

Guns a really difficult to throw accurately.


If she had used a gun, this would never have made the news. Media doesn’t like guns used to thwart crimes.


Aha - no wonder I’ve been getting the feeling BB is literally empty calories (literally!)! Thanks for pointing that out.

Edit: that would also explain the take-up of @Doctorow’s books. Enlightened, am I.

If she would have busted his spine in two and he survived, then , unfortunately, she would have been looking at a huge lawsuit because she had “over reacted”.


That’s unfortunate? You feel that chopping up the spines of bad guys is a fine thing to do? I respectfully disagree.


Wow, you’re sharp today.

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I guess I’ll go ahead and be the only person here to say it: it’s too bad she didn’t remove him permanently from society. Our “justice system” is just going to make him a worse problem and allow him to continue predating on people. It needs to be a normal expectation that entering someone’s home with foul intent will likely result in death for the offender.

This isn’t because of any idealization of revenge or bloodthirstiness, or membership in the GOP (ha, very much not). I just think the approach to violent or property crime should be effective at protecting the rest of society and a lot less focused on “best punishment.” If and when there’s effective psychological “corrections” in the corrections system, then sure, call the cops to deal with these kind; until then, do us a favor and remove them.


Completely agree. Sadly you’ve got too many people in the world who don’t like that approach and would rather support criminals.