Originally published at: Can you slap a chicken until it's cooked? | Boing Boing
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Just wash your hands before and after.
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This has been done like a dinner but it is still as FAF.
If the chicken doesn’t have a face, isn’t it a spanking machine?
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How rapidly do you have to do the slapping to exceed the pace of heat radiation? It’s not just a matter of slapping it 135,000 times. You gotta keep slapping before the heat can dissipate.
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Forget that brick oven. Pay no attention to that sous vide. Hot pots are so last year! Soon the Boing-Boing Store will be offering alternative ways to prepare those foods you used to grill/bake/boil. 
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No no no, you choke your chicken, its your monkey you spank!
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Ugh, that’s just fowl. 
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Sound engineer for porn movies says it was his idea.
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Sorry, on short notice, this is the best I can do.
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This is either a reboing or has been discussed in the Happy Mutants Food thread. I think.
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But did we resolve it?
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How do you know when your goose is cooked?
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When the thermometer pops out?
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