Cheap safe looks like a book

Originally published at:

Unless that outer faux-paper layer is particularly strong, looks like you could just bend it back in the corners and push the hinge rod out.


Well you can also just take it with you, probably looks less suspicious walking out of a place with a dictionary under your arm than a bag bulging with loot


It’s the perfect place for me to store my dank carpet samples, thanks!

This book jacket also discourages snooping:


Big mistake. Most intruders already know to inspect the bookshelf to pull down the book that is actually a lever, rotating the bookshelf 180 degrees and revealing the hidden room of Professor Moriarty.


When I did that in my new house, all I found was a closet with a locked safe at the back. Should I try and open it?


The old trick was to take a book, and carve a space among the pages. I’ve actually picked up books at book sales with such spaces.

Not perfectly safe, but if you count on nobody looking at books, probably the lock is redundant. The lock is actually a giveaway if someone pulls out the book, but what robber thumbs through books before taking them?

As someone loints out, pick an unappealing title. So you likely can evenbuy a used hardcover textbook, bound to repulse all but a few. Even glue the pages together to make it easier to access the secret compartment.

But don’t forget you have something valuable in there, in case you throw it out.


And to think I almost liked this comment.


Candles are also known to operate the doors of secret lairs:


it’s good to have a place to keep honest folks honest… and pry marks etc can be proof of lack of consent to a search in court.


“I bought the book second hand and never got around to reading it. Had no idea what was in there”


The events of El Camino: a Breaking Bad Movie suggest that may not be the best solution.


It’s just so your kids don’t steal your Snickers. Any small safe like that you can take and crow bar later.

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Unappealing title? Doesn’t matter what you pick, there’s someone out there who’s interested. " ‘1987 Illinois Actuary Calculus Tables’? Woo hoo!"


But it reduces the number of people who would pick that book.

I was going to suggest a medical text, but then did realize some wouod be interested. I wouldn’t be interested, so it’s important to choose based on what other people might think.

It works in reverse. “Let’s hide this from the kids”, so you better not use a title that suggests sex.

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Sure; we’ll even help you crowdfund it…

In theory, Todd’s ‘kitchen solution’ wasn’t too bad, though.

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“Hey guys, today we’re going to take a look at … and it’s open.”
“This is the Lockpicking Lawyer, and what I have for you today”
[intense sweating from the safe].
“You know I’ll just take this down to the baseme…”
[safe springs open]


I feel kinda’ bad for children who don’t learn about sex
the old fashioned way… on the internet.

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Screw this, I have a real safe - and it’s not one of those cheap fireproof boxes. My rule of thumb is that if you’re going to keep people out of your home and your stuff, use the best hardware you can afford and have it properly installed. This means Grade 1 door locks and burglary rated safes. Anything else is a waste of money.


Unappealing title?