Chris Christie: track immigrants like FedEx packages


#1

[Read the post]


#2

He also doesn’t appear to know how courier tracking works. Fedex only know where the package was last scanned, which in some cases may not be it’s current location. This may be more of an issue when the things you are trying to track in your authoritarian arsehole fashion can move of their own accord. Is he proposing a scanner at every street corner that the immigrants have to scan themselves at? Sounds like a Big Goverment kind of solution.


#3

Christie doesn’t need to know how courier tracking works… not his problem – that’s why he’s hiring Fred, who is an expert in it!

Also: Fred Smith is Skull and Bones, and, as a fraternity brother of George W. Bush, was twice offered the secretary of defense position.


#4

I don’t think that his ‘solution’ has to actually deliver anything, or even make any sense, it just has to be a demonstration of his fealty to Free Market Innovation and clamping down on the Mexican Menace.

So long as it does that, any tedious ‘facts’ about how actual logistics systems work, or how they notably wouldn’t work with things that can move by themselves and have an incentive to be not-tracked, are beside the point.


#5

In fairness, he’d likely suggest somewhere that he would find unobtrusive himself: underside of left boob.


#6

Could work if some semipersistent ID token of daily use is associated with the person. A creditcard or a cellphone is offering itself.

For persistence, there’s biometrics. Any single approach won’t work well (unreliable or doesn’t work remotely), but combine identification by face, voice, fingerprints, gait, retina, hand vein pattern or finger dimensions, and you have a fairly solid framework…

Like with packages it’d provide tracking only for recorded event (package scanned, ID token used…), though. Unlike packages, if the tracked objects have an incentive to not be tracked, the reliability will go down significantly.


#7

middle finger between nail and knuckle


#8

Holy Crap!
Is that picture of Christie real? Or has that been stretched?
I might have to change my bet about when he’ll stroke out…


#9

Doesn’t he need to shoot them with the tranquilizer gun first & then tag them?


#10

I still think this is just code for “box them up and leave them in a truck for 3 days”.


#11

Derivative idea. This is a direct copy of the trackers installed by the Koch brothers when they buy a politician.


#12

Forearm is traditional. Sometimes over a triangle.


#13

I’m a bad ex-christian - I’m forgetting all the crazy stuff I learned back in the day. At first I thought this was, like, a nazi reference or something. Nice to see this being proposed by the party mostly likely to contain people who take that mark of the beast shit literally.


#14

I laughed so hard when I read this. It’s so idiotic on so many levels. I’m convinced he knows damn well what stupid shit this idea is, but he’s trying to out-crazy Trump (and the other Republicans who are also trying to out-crazy Trump) to get attention.


#15

I would definitely put it on the forehead, it would also be great tool for regulating illegals commerce - if you don’t have the number we could make it illegal to buy or sell!


#16

My visa already has RFID, and I assume my cellphone data is already filed away by one agency or another so I naturally assume that I am tracked every time I’m visiting your country and possibly even when I’m not.

Because after all, it doesn’t matter if its possible, its just about making sure that he may be a clown, but at least he’s advertising he’s “the right kind of clown” If you know what I mean.


#17

The RFID/NFC chip is worthless for tracking. Too low range. The tracking is done by the core function of the card, the payments. It is highly likely that when the card is used, it is you who is doing it. This itself provides the where-when-what datapoints about your activity.

Same with the cellphones, with yet higher level of granularity - not only your movements (fine when you use it, coarse, the cell handovers, when it is just idle), but also your social networks, or with whom you are communicating.

All that applies to all the “free Western nations”, and most others.


#18

Isn’t numbers tattooed on your body one of the signs of Satan?


#19

It’s real but he’s lost weight since the photo was taken. He’s had his stomach stapled.


#20

Maybe it’s that “weight of two for the price of one” kind of deals?