Who knew, right? Maybe unicorns really DO exist too.
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Oh, the reviews. 
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spose gaping void will turn up for the rally
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Yeah, but how fuckin’ balling would you look doing knee slides on snowy days?
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why would you need pockets.
Just carry a clutch.
Why didn’t we think of this? I usually just create a string of tampons around my neck and pretend it’s jewelry. 
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That is some damn good thinking!
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I’m sure Etsy has such a gift if you’re looking for something for your favorite female.
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Why not wrap a few cigarette papers around it and keep it behind your ear like a joint. Far more socially acceptable.
/s
Incidentally, was doing a pile of mending/alterations the other day and a couple of the skirts and dresses had actual properly-sized and aligned pockets in them. Like, off-the-rack ones, not custom jobs. 
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Why bother with the cigarette papers? I’ve never personally tried it, but apparently one can soak such items in alcohol and get quite a “high.” Who knew? Tampons! The new duct tape!
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Also, @anon67050589…
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Quite a few actually…
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Thanks! I hope that link helps others, but you might remember I’ve mentioned that those styles would not look good on my body, even with the right measurements.
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None of them would?
http://www.eshakti.com/SearchProducts.aspx?q=dresses%20with%20pockets
Even if you think so, it’s worth reminding other people that this exists.
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Nope, those styles don’t look good when the torso is longer and bustier and the legs are shorter.
Totally agree.
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Oh! I’m sorry! I do sort of vaguely remember that… 
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I think the issue is that it’s not a universal
If a guy buys trousers, the pockets are a given. If the pockets are missing or are too small for a phone, it’s unusual.
Now, if you go to a shop, and go through the rack of dresses, (or even women’s trousers), a sizable fraction (perhaps even a majority) will not have functional pockets.
Perhaps there are labels where some head designer has put her foot down-- “This is ridiculous – if there’s a side seam, there should be a pocket.” If you stick to a few labels where pockets are a given, it’s probably easier. But if you’re shopping at a brick and mortar store, you still have to filter out the stuff that doesn’t actually have pockets. And if you really like the stuff that doesn’t have pockets-- I suppose it can be even more aggravating.
On line, I suppose you can do stuff like
but then you might have to deal with the fact that sizing is all over the map, which is an entirely separate issue.
(A clutch, as I understand it, must be held, or left with someone else. No fussy straps or handles to ruin the lines, or improve the practicality)
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How about a sexy garter pocket for those pocket less dresses?
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Wow! I haven’t seen that image in decades! Don’t remember exactly where I saw it (probably that whole article is internet-famous and I’m the only one who doesn’t remember its provenance), but I was always tickled by the idea that future postapocalyptic archaeologists would guess so very wrongly what all our modern stuff meant to us, right down to the pronunciation of the holy mantra “sanitized for your protection.”
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