Come on down to Mar a Lago, the White-House-in-Exile!

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2020/11/11/come-on-down-to-mar-a-lago-the-white-house-in-exile.html

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“Bubba soooo sleepy”

Needs more “South of the Border”

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Hahahahahasobsobsob

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It’s actually not too far off the mark. Sources are speculating donny smallhands will escape to Mar a Largo for xmas and never return for the January inaugural ceremonies. Good riddance to bad rubbish! Also it’s going to be hilarious to see if any of his MAGA cultists actually try and show up there. Like the good people of West Palm would want ANYTHING to do with the trailer park crowd!

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So what’s currently seen as the most likely outcome? That Trump retreats to Mar a Lago and sets up his own pretend government-in-exile, or that he refuses to leave the White House and there is a confrontation of some kind? Are bookies currently taking wagers? If so, what are the odds they’re taking?

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It’s funny because it’s (extremely likely to turn out to be) true! In particular, Trump, after January 20th, giving away “pardons” feels very much in line with Trump “University.” Running non-tax-deductable “charities” seems like a logical step - but I guess they’re already doing that with political contributions they spend on themselves…

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Why would he wait until Jan 20 to give away pardons? Why wouldn’t he start selling them like indulgences? That’s what I would do if I were a crooked grifter.

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He doesn’t want the outrage and story to interfere with other grifting in the interim. Pardon power is absolute- a middle finger to everyone on the way out the door is the best tactic.

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Can’t we hope he’ll start his vacation on Thanksgiving? And then never return to the Whitehouse?

The important thing is that when he takes a vacation, they change the locks at the Whitehouse. Then put his belongings on the Lawn.

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He can have anything he actually paid for.

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Let’s put a wall around Mar a Lago and tell LOSER that it is to keep others out*, enabling the Trump clan to establish their own pretend state within a state there. It can be much like the Vatican, but without all that praying (Paula White, excluded).

*Hey, why’s the lock on the outside?

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And make Trump pay for it.

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I borrowed a friend’s time machine.

—SPOILERS AHEAD—


Retreats to Mar a Lago.
Begins broadcasting his internet channel (charging exorbitant subscription rate, where along with all his Trump paraphernalia, he advertises branded versions of: gold investment instruments, prepper supplies, male enhancement drugs).
Begins campaign for 2024, holding 8-10 rallies a month.
Publishes (ghost-written) book.
Catches Covid again.
Divorces Melania, marries new Eastern European 30 year old model.
Runs for POTUS versus Kamala Harris.

(Wins.)

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I’m goin’ down to Mar a Lago gonna have myself a time
Very fine people everywhere classy folks without taxation

I’m goin’ down to Mar a Lago gonna leave my woes behind
Playin’ golf Day or Night, people watching Fox & Friends

I’m headin’ down to Mar a Lago gonna see if I can’t unwind
… … … … … … … … (Jared Kushner’s line)

So come on down to Mar a Lago, the White-House-in-Exile!

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Was he a brain in a jar by that point? ‘Cause his body isn’t going to last that long.

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And dies shortly thereafter.
Melania gets all the money moves back to Slovenia to open a number of strip malls.
Mar a Lago sold to make way for a trailer park slash fishing camp.
Trailer park slash fishing camp shuts down after human remains determined to be underage hookers found…

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I do not like this prediction, but it does have a ring of truth about it.

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I see what you did there

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A Melania/Ghislaine venture.

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