Because reasons?
Arenât we always? Didnât we miss you? Donât you need a big ole hug?
#NO JOB NO HUG
right?
What?!? But why wouldnât he get hugs anyways?
Would that explain everything?
How did I accumulate so much stuuuuuuufffff?
Amazing isnât it? Even when stuck in an apartment?
Can you find matches?
And didnât I get rid of a boatload of crap before we moved into this place four years ago?
On the plus side, hasnât my limited budget been responsible for keeping the accumulation of more possessions from growing exponentially? And didnât we get rid of unused kitchen stuff when we had a small-scale bug infestation last year? So really, am I just complaining about the fact that I own things and they need to be packed into boxes?
Haha, why must you tempt me so?
Canât you see that Iâve been where you are and realized that you probably donât need all that stuff?
Youâve been in my apartment?
You donât know Iâm in your crawlspace?
You mean that chewing noise isnât rats after all, itâs YOU? What are you eating up there?
Youâve seen Shallow Grave? Any weird holes in your ceiling?
Wouldnât any kind of hole in my ceiling be described as âweirdâ?
You donât know thatâs me chewing on rats?
Why do they sound so crunchy?
Oh, thatâs not me, you heard that too?