Well, would you look at that? Don’t I greatly appreciate your advice in this matter? Do they actually have a category listed as “smoke & spice”? 
(that’s a dancer, apparently) Have you not found me my next beer purchase?
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Isn’t it all one sentence?
Try Императорское Русское Але ?
Didn’t it translate perfectly well in Russian? Why was Google so confused?
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Doesn’t an exclamation mark indicate the end of a sentence, unless - aha! a loophole? - in a quotation or interjection?
Possibly because the normal grammatical order has been changed (from “Russian Imperial” to “Imperial Russian”) ? (And all for the sake for a cross-script pun?)
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Who would turn down a beer?
Should I try rubbing alcohol?
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Why, does it have a cramp? Are you expecting a genie?
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Isn’t there a guy who works down the chip shop swears he’s Elvis?
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Condolences, but doesn’t that sound like the perfect excuse to slide it over to her?
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Wouldn’t that be interesting?
Did you know that there are many nearly-identical words and phrases between Ukrainian and Czechoslovakian, perhaps almost as much as between Ukrainian and Russian? So perhaps this particular phrase – the way you wrote it the first time – was in a word order not generally used in Russian but more so in the satellite former-Soviet countries?
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didn’t I hear that awful song enough back in the 80s?
Would you be so kind as to share with us a review in the style of Michael Borys?
Does somebody have a bit of a crush?
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Jealous?
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Wouldn’t that have been perfect if only it had arrived (by special order) BEFORE she left to go back home to Michigan? (Yes, literally later the same day after we all dispersed.)
But now that you mention it, aren’t we going to have our belated family get-together sometime in January, so wouldn’t your idea work just as well then?
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How would I do that? Is he known for a particular review style? Other than the fact that he’s apparently a contributor here, is there any other pertinent info about the guy I should know?
And wouldn’t you prefer a review for a beer worth drinking? 
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An Orange Crush?
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??
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Doesn’t he have a very advertorial style (perhaps due to his background in native advertising), leading to accusations of shilling?
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