Drunk gentleman steals armored vehicle, rams it into shop, steals bottle of wine

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2018/01/12/drunk-gentleman-steals-armored.html

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Not again. What is it with Russians leaving APs where drunks can get them?

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Ah. Russia. The Florida of Europe. Only cold…

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“Russian man, inebriated, feared bullets on wine run, attempted to drive APC to store. News at 11.”

I would never do that, because I hate wine.

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RIGHT? What are the chances, essentially the exact same thing happening twice in a week?! :wink:

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Ah, just your typical Tuesday night then?

Don’t BoingBoing contributers read BoingBoing?

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Look, given the current state of the world, who wouldn’t steal an armored vehicle? Not stealing an armored vehicle nowadays makes you a no-account coward, and that’s just the way it is. Everyone here who isn’t out stealing armored vehicles, including me, needs to take a long look at themselves and ask ‘why not’?

And obviously once you steal an armored vehicle you have to drive it somewhere, the important thing in these situations is motion. And why not to the liquor store, the vehicle needs fuel but so do you. I’m sure once he was done crashing into the liquor store he planned on crashing into a gas station.

But crashing into the store to steal wine? It is a sad thing when the most heroic amongst us, those who see farthest, are also idiots looking at the wrong thing far away.

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Peak Russia.

Hey, maybe the dude just really has a thing for Tank Girl. I can dig.

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He wasn’t clear on the concept of neutral turning an armored vehicle.

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