Explaining marine invertebrate reproductive strategies to the lobster-obsessed Jordan Peterson

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2018/05/21/crepidula-fornicata.html

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But-but-but-but…serotonin!

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The final boss of the lobster hierarchy:

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Ugh, can we please stop giving this guy any energy?

Lobsters are food, not behavioral role models.

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…is this Peterson Month here on BoingBoing? He has not been mentioned once for ages and ages (right choice!) and now there’s ninety stories about him on the front page? Why on Earth…?

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I guess that looks inviting to some people, but giant ocean insects that only taste anywhere near good if you dunk them in butter are a hard pass for me.

(And yes I say we talk about actual lobsters here instead of, yet again, that energy-leech Peterson!)

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That was an epic takedown.

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Look at this awesome lobster.

Just look at it.

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I’m all about the sea bugs, and there are many tasty ways to prepare them!

(But my point still stands that I don’t take my cues on ‘how to behave’ from a lesser species, that we eat as a delicacy.)

I agree!

Lob

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THIS MAN KNOWS NOTHING OF LOBSTERS.

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I wear this community flag with pride.

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I think that all of the rituals that surround dining on lobster are thuggish. Picking one from a tank, live boiling, bashing it with a (ridiculously tiny) hammer, tearing it apart with bare hands.

Honestly, how does anyone keep their appetite through all that? There are so many other things you can dip in butter that will taste just as good, or better, without acting like you are living out some super villain fantasy on your archnemisis The Lunging Lobster or wtf ever.

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To continue the lobster takeover:

People have only recently thought so. Not so long ago,

Lobster was an unfamiliar, vaguely disgusting bottom feeding ocean dweller that sort of did (and does) resemble an insect, its distant relative. The very word comes from the Old English loppe, which means spider. People did eat lobster, certainly, but not happily and not, usually, openly. Through the 1940s, for instance, American customers could buy lobster meat in cans (like spam or tuna), and it was a fairly low-priced can at that. In the 19th century, when consumers could buy Boston baked beans for 53 cents a pound, canned lobster sold for just 11 cents a pound. People fed lobster to their cats.

Not to say that some don’t find these bugs tasty, but as for me, I always hope there’s something else on any seafood place’s menu.

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I never buy live lobster (why bother?), but I’d dispatch it like any other live seafood. Which is to say, a quick knife through the brain.

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What stage of internet famous is when you get ridiculed on BoingBoing?.. I hope its near the end.

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But of course!

I’ve actually known and dated people who were deathly allergic to shellfish, and plenty of others who just don’t care for them.

Meanwhile, I’m sort of a weird opposite; I don’t like most non-shelled fish because of the texture. (Notable exceptions are tuna, salmon and halibut.)

Basically I’m really picky about my seafood, and only tend to like the stuff that’s generally overpriced.

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Hmmm… I thought bees were the correct false analogy to humans.

There’s one queen, she’s bigger than everyone else, they all serve her, she mates with all the males - and then they go off and die.

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IT’S A COOKBOOK!

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This must be a trap; I say Cory is honey-potting.

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He is an undeniable master of fishing. Lo, he excels at baiting.

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