Facebook Dating launches because nothing matters

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2019/09/06/facebook-dating-launches-becau.html

They’ve ruined democracy, now they’re ready to ruin your love life.

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Back in my day we called it “cyber stalking.”

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Isn’t that getting back to their original purpose? i.e. Gets dates for Zuck and friends.

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Good luck, humanity. It’s not like you weren’t warned.

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I’m legitimately surprised it took them this long.

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Well, I suppose it will be a great place to meet people with boundary issues and a high tolerance for routine dishonesty, deception; and assorted cynical emotional manipulation.

This should go poorly indeed.

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Man, I miss Facebook less every day.

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Whatever could go wrong? Do you really want to entrust your love life to a bunch of losers? At least the folks at ICE, TSA, DOJ, etc.?

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“Weird. Ever since I went to that new coffee shop last week, I’ve been getting only legal services ads on FaceBook with an emphasis on restraining orders?”

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“So, how did you two meet???”

I could tell you, but I’d have to kill myself.

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i quit for a while, but ended up going back because I completely lost touch with a lot of people. Never knew when bands were playing, parties happening etc. We obviously need some sort of social media. We need a good alternative ship to jump to.

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8dec91d690ed0121b1d2363f9535d1d5

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Legislated requirements for APIs would help, I think. makes it easier to move your data to a competing service.

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it would be cool if social media somehow worked more like email… or even text messaging. Like it doesn’t matter the company you use, they all work together and you can read and send emails from a variety of 3rd party software. some people actually seem to use it this way already, cross posting the same thing to instagram and facebook (which I know are subsidiaries of one company now…). I’m sure what I am suggesting has a billion logistical problems.

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It’s only for 18-and-over

Like that was even needed, with their ever-greying demographic. At least racist uncles will finally have a shot at finding a new wife to abuse and gaslight

Dumbf*ck Dating™.

Mastadon and other decentralised, federated FOSS platforms are the best way to go. The challenge is user adoption.

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*only for those finally ready to date a Trumphole

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Wait…
An opt-IN social feature on FB?
Call me surprised.

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“You two have so much in common! We can’t tell you what, but trust us on this.”

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Oh I dunno — if Facebook data can get Donald Trump elected and make Brexit happen, maybe it can find this bachelor a significant other.

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