Originally published at: Fancy Feast will be serving cat food for humans in New York | Boing Boing
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In other words, we finally get to taste the aromatic pet vittles without shame.
The 16 lucky cat lovers will enjoy a complimentary tasting menu that will transport them to Italy for the evening, as Chef Casella shares his Italian heritage and passion for cooking with a menu of authentic, Tuscan dishes, while Chef Hassner shares her culinary expertise to mirror the sensory experience of cats at mealtime.
Ah, okay. So, basically this…
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I was repairing the rotted out fittings on my barn hydrant last weekend and an adorable little frog scampered about in the small lake formed by my digging around the leaky pipes. My barn cat swallowed the frog down in one gulp, then had a beetle for a chaser. I don’t think she experiences taste in quite the same way as I do and I don’t think I want a simulation of her palate.
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If it’s anything like dog food it’ll be way to bland, and that’s coming from me.
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Yes, but it’s just Italian dishes, not really “cat food”. Maybe the experience is having to eat out of a bowl without using your hands? 
(Don’t even tell me about the restrooms)
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My cat spends about an hour a day licking his ass, so I’d have to question the quality of anything he’d be willing to eat.
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Agreed. My house cat keeps my place free of wolf spiders. I don’t want to experience even a translation of his inclination to do so.
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Wolf spiders could taste like granny’s fresh baked cinnamon rolls and I’d still skip the feline=>human taste translation, thank you very much!
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I can’t help but notice that felines aren’t invited to this dining experience, and I don’t know about anyone else but I’m fairly sure my cat would be livid if I got caught attending such shenanigans. 
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It’s the wriggliness and biteyness of the wolf spiders I’m more aghast by .
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I believe that’s an extreme example of “mouthfeel.”
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Are we also going to get the cat-hork experience? Mine frequently guzzles her breakfast too quickly, and in a few minutes up it comes. If the vomitorium is part of the dinner, I’ll give it a hard pass.
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My wife feeds our 5 cats their wet food. In the morning I can smell it all the way upstairs, I I I I don’t like that.
She knows which cats like which food, if I have to feed them I open up one can and split it up, if they walk away, fine come back later for dinner and try again.
The exception is the two hospice kitties, I will try something else with them because they can’t have their medicine on an empty stomach.
The funny thing is, the oldest sickest wackiest one will sometimes turn his nose at the chef’s choice, if I turn my back, put the food on a different plate and pretend it’s from a different can he’ll eat it.
Goofball.
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Salmon aux fines herbes.
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Hairball. Because of you dicks, I have been a cat for so long. Do you know where this tongue has been? [hard whisper]… Places
-Zari, Legends of Tomorrow
As a child I tried cat kibble. It was awful but my curiosity was satisfied.
As an adult, I would microwave my bro’s dog’s food and pretend to eat it before giving the dog the “leftovers.” I did this every visit. Dog was sick and didn’t eat enough. He figured out my brother was tricking him, but never caught on when it was me. It was really disgusting and I wanted to gag every time.
So yeah. Human fancy feast doesn’t sound good. Though I’d totally pet the kitty
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Years ago, I had an elderly dog who had a tumor in his nose which affected his sense of smell. During his last few weeks, the only food I could get him to eat smelled like roadkill, and he’d only eat it if I fed him with a fork. He was perfectly happy to eat from the fork, but he didn’t seem to believe it was food if it was just sitting in the bowl. Meanwhile I’m trying really hard not to breathe through my nose because that stuff smelled terrible. (He was such a sweet doggo.)
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This sounds like a Nathan Fielder prank. Like “Dumb Starbucks” or something…
As someone whose cats became addicted to FF classic foods long before the pandemic, I have this advice for Fancy Feast and their global conglomerate operators: GET YOUR FARKING PRODUCTS BACK ON THE GROCERY SHELVES before you go adventuring into learning how New Yorkers react to marketing your brand elsewhere on the mamillian phylogenic tree.
You want to see videos of our cats trying to bury their wet food because there have been only three or four varieties at local stores that they will even consider eating, for the last year and a half? Because it happens here several times every week!
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