German man assaults security guard with delicious kebab slathered in herbal sauce

Originally published at: German man assaults security guard with delicious kebab slathered in herbal sauce | Boing Boing

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How is it still so intact after the throwing?

ETA: there is a tiny inscription that says “Symbolbild”! Which means the image the police tweeted isn’t the offending kebab, just one that represents it visually. In other words, a police social media person literally took a picture of their lunch for this tweet

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Don’t waste food folks, on something like an ACAB is all the worst.

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Didn’t you mean to say, “all the wurst”?

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A Berlin döner barely qualifies as food

(I should add that döner is the food of the gods, but Berlin is notorious for its low döner prices and corresponding quality issues)

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I’m imagining that the social media person thought to hirself “I need a picture of a kebab. Perfect opportunity!” And then charged it to the police department. At least, I hope that’s how it went down.

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Looks succulent!

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A jelly doughnut armed with a kebab?

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Not so low anymore these days, but the quality is probably still the same!

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Herbal sauce at a German train station? Sounds like a case of zhug by the Zug.

I’ll see myself out.

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That kebab looks delicious…

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First I read that as Kebob and I was reminded of the assassin who tried to kill James Bond with some flaming meat skewers.

image

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It autotranslated to fisticuffs? That’s a bit archaic?

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I just checked and google does indeed do Handgreiflichkeiten → fisticuffs

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Thanks for posting the German with translation, as along with “fisticuffs” I also appreciated the word “Wurfguts” (google = throwing goods, I would say “throwing materials”); yet another thing we don’t have a word for in English.

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love the ruler in the photo for scale. this was no ordinary sandwich.

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Just a guess on my part, but this sort of thing is probably not covered in the 1989 „Festschreibung der Berliner Verkehrsauffassung für das Fleischerzeugnis Dönerkebap“.

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I was intrigued, in (british) english, fisticuffs isn’t used much, except perhaps in a humorous article where hopefully no one was seriously harmed, which seems to fit the bill. My german ain’t so great that i could detect the difference but i do hope the german is written in a humorous style too.

Breaking down the german word into hand greiflich keiten
Hand palpable opportunities

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I think fisticuffs is a perfectly cromulent word.
Berlin kebabs are not really good. They manage perfectly as drunk food, which was probably the case here.

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In general, yes.

Handgreiflichkeiten is not a particularly humourous or archaic word though.

I’d guess “physical altercations” or “scuffling” would be more usual in a UK police version of the tweet.

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