"Greedy Bastard" burger criticized

some people here are missing a great opportunity to talk about ridiculous burgers! :slight_smile:

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I can helps?

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You’re not a lone voice, shouting uselessly into the void. I too shall heed your call!

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My own personal theory is cheese, cheese goes with everything… Including pineapple :wink:

I like pineapple. Pineapple lumps, for example, are da bomb.

But there are places that pineapple has no place inserting itself. Pizza is one of those places, and my burger is another.

Beetroot? Hell yeah!
Fried egg? Bring it!
Bacon? Why is this even a question?
Avacado? Of course!
Cheese? Sure (unless it’s Brie, in which case make mine a double)
Tomato? Well, ok, put in in.
Lettuce? If you must.

But pineapple? Get dafuq outta here!


Some time ago I came across a place that sold something called an ‘Untold Burger’ (it was at that burger place hard left over the railway lines in Paekakariki, for any locals). Basically they emptied the fridge into the space between the halves of a bun, via the grill. As I recall there were 2 patties, at least one egg, a slab of cheese at least 5mm thick, loads of beetroot, lettuce, tomato, a hashbrown, creamed corn (seriously. And don’t laugh till you’ve tried it. Then laugh. In awe.), onion, several sauces, and a bunch of other things I don’t even remember. It was … astonishing. You had to eat it as basically two open sandwiches, rather than a single food item. Luckily I was young at the time, with a ridicuosly high metabolism. I think it’d kill me if I had one today, either by choking or induced heart attack.

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It has got to be easier than the cactus…

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That’s fine, I have no problem with that (it might sting a bit though - pineapple is really acidic). Just don’t put it in my burger, before or after.

Also, compulsory:

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I have and it’s just some anonymous pale green mush that gets in the way of the bacon.

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OK, tomatoes… and pineapple, but I’m drawing the line there :wink:

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And also a berry.

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My personal favourite “odd burger topping” is macaroni and cheese. It was a bit messy, but delicious nonetheless.

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I would hug you if we were IRL. The instant I read “no tomatoes”, my mind went straight to the Ur-joke, and then the very next post was your riff on that same joke.

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I am so trying that soon. One of my brother made spaghetti tacos once, after that, I’ll try just about anything.

The only right way is do this is with pineapple, cherries and banana. accept no imitations.

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