Happy Mutants Guide to Understanding Football

It’s the only approach that’s ever worked for me.

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Whereas in curling the alcoholic beverages are consumed in the course of the game. So more like communion than baptism, I suppose, but that’s why the strategy is more of a challenge.

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Here you go.

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Same here. Though Leicester City atop the Premier League? Meh. ManU has been disappointing this year. I guess all that money doesn’t buy a great football club.

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Not meh to me. But I’m from Leicester, so I might be a bit biased.

The general impression I get is that most football fans are happy to see a non-big club doing well (relatively, anyway - Leicester are still owned by billionaires) - and let’s not worry too much about that time they went bankrupt and wrote off all their debts a few years (and owners) ago.

Man Utd can die in a fire. Le yawn.

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Watch out or I’ll start cheering for them. I guarantee, it’s the kiss of death! :slightly_smiling:

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You just described the “news” in New Zealand, which frequently goes “Something, something All Blacks something … ; and in other news there was [some mayhem that should have headlined].” :weary:

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I’m tired of magazines
Saying tactical butts are the thing

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It bothers me how much the ‘coach’ (that’s the technical term, right?) looks like the UK’s current porcophiliac Prime Minister. So much so that I question his motives for being a coach.

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I thought the Americans played three games, rounders, netball and catch?

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If you want a musical about proper football, you’re stuck with The Beautiful Game - by Ben Elton and Andrew Lloyd Webber. Here’s the Hungarian version:

I think everyone who doesn’t support a Premier League title rival wants Leicester City to win, especially after this promise.

Carlisle United are doing well in League 2 too, predicted to be in a relegation fight at the start of the season and they’re now seriously looking at the promotion play-offs with a chance of automatic promotion too.

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Anyone who has played the Football Manager games (Or their predecessor, Championship Manager) can tell you there is a lot of strategy involved in Association Football.

There’s a really old but legitimately freeware version available if you aren’t scared of becoming addicted to it

Edit: There is also a free version of Out of the Park Baseball 8 if you want to play a US sport. There’s nothing for American Football that I know of though.

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It should be worth noting that along with the opposing team, the entire nation will attempt to stop a person of African descent from dancing on the dance floor.

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You know me, I like tactical butts.

Amateurs talk about tactical butts, but professionals study the logistics of butts.

So does FOX “News” here! Although, that’s probably a different context.

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Don’t forget rugby. I think I heard they had a big match yesterday, for the American championship or something. Apparently Beyoncé just nailed Cwm Rhondda.

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Look- Everybody knows that football is about one thing, and one thing alone-

It’s a game of extremely muscular men dressed in the tighest of shorts, the sweat glistening on their firm, athletic bodies, on a field to chase and jump on one another; as experienced older men go looking for strapping young high school boys to become wide receivers and tight ends for teams like the Rams and the Packers, where they will enjoy communal showers- Clearly, football is all about totally heteromanly, no homo sportsmanship.

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That is what we call “catch”. One guy throws a ball, and another guy tries to catch it. I guess, technically though, because there are more than two players involved, it is what we would call, “Piggy in the Middle”; a popular game with young Conservatives, I believe.

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