Another Christopher and Paulie mishap.
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I think it was a boy scouts lunch that just went wrong
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Sweet FSM!! It’s a divine visitation! When does the shrine go up?
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Oh no–it’s a shame no one harvested it while it was still al dente. Wild pasta is so delicious and fetches a much higher price than the conventionally farmed stuff.
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Also, I thought we already had agreed that the Strega Nona theory was the most plausible.
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Solved:
Neighbors said that the oodles of noodles came from a nearby home that is up for sale. A military veteran moving out of his mother’s home after her death seemingly found a stockpile of old food that she had kept in the house.
“I mean, I really feel like he was just trying to clear out his parents’ house and they were probably stocked up from COVID,” said neighbor Keith Rost, saying it’s a generational thing. “My grandparents always had a cupboard full of cans and pasta, just to be safe.”
I’m really annoyed that the culprit didn’t consider donating it to a food bank or shelter.
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Sadly, most food banks and such are required to absolutely abide by the expiration date on packaged food, even though for dried and canned foods those are pretty meaningless. So good chance it would have would up in a dumpster anyway.
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Good point – I never think about expiration dates on dry pasta.
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You really shouldn’t, but lawyers ruin everything. 
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In other news, dozens of sluggish carbed-up squirrels have been sighted lazing about the forest floor.
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The earlier report said it was 15 wheelbarrows full of pasta. Did that much pasta really come from one house overstocked with dried pasta? That seems like a lot. I mean…we keep a lot of dried pasta in our pantry, way more than we need, to be honest, but it’s not 15 wheelbarrows worth. It might be one.
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It does seem excessive but maybe not if she was a hoarder. If it was from an extreme hoarding situation the food might not be safe to eat due to contamination form bugs/animals/trash.
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Way better than the ketchup packets they feasted on in that episode, I’m sure.
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If I could fit 50 lasagnas in my freezer, I certainly would.
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Just make them really, really small lasagnas. If I cleared out my garage freezer, I actually might be able to get 50 lasagnas in there. Not huge lasagnas, but just normal sized ones. There wouldn’t be room for anything else, but I could probably do it. I have a big garage freezer.
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The tv news story I saw said the person responsible for dumping all that pasta is known to have had mental health issues.
It was pointed out that the town has no bulk trash pickup, and people dump oversized garbage, like couches and mattresses near that area. Perhaps something will finally be done to resolve it. The reporting made that the main thrust of the story, altho they also mentioned the negative environmental effects of spoilt pasta on the water and stream banks.
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