Shhhhh! Nothing else is working, so I’m trying a new tack.
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we had our chance in August
but in September we lost the war
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A single doubloon contains >6.7 g of 22-carat gold. Do the math.
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Both. Always both.
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We’re not as funny as we used to be. You have passed the point of diminishing returns.
I’ll PayPal you $20. I bet others will follow.
Call Smitty.
Open the safe.
Report back here.
I’m out of comedy.
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But what if evil people like me pay him more not to open the safe?
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You’ll be the first one locked into the safe when the revolution comes.
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I literally laughed out loud when I read your response. A full, deep, hearty laugh that may have been slightly maniacal at the same time.
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This is like when I went to a dueling piano bar and they played Piano Man until people paid them to stop, then started again when other people paid them to.
repeat ad nauseum, which is pretty quick when Billy Joel music is involved
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#PARTY AT ROB’S HOUSE
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Why can’t we kickstarter or gofundme or indiegogo the $400 necessary to bust Rob’s safe wide open?
I am good for $20 $50! That’s only $350 remaining!
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You really don’t like chatty threads, do you? 
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I’ve kicked in. My only caveat is that if Rob receives substantially more than his $400 quote, he’s obliged to resort to cartoonishly over-the-top methods of busting this safe wide open. And either way, the bastard’s gotta film it and upload it.
Okay, that’s a couple of caveats.
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Just $290 now!
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Step up safe interior denialists.
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Nah, if there’s extra money he should spend it on something cool he can pretend was inside the safe, so we won’t all be disappointed about it being empty.
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He should do that anyway, so we don’t all end up flipping over police cars and burning down convenience stores.
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at least until 2017. I’m all set with disappointment for 2016.
Although, once opened, it would make a fantastic place to keep the BB Strategic Disappointment Reserve.
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