I found a locked safe hidden at the back of a closet in my new house

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1333

I just hope Rob found the right lock smith

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1334

Weā€™re halfway home already! $201 of $400 raised!

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1336

A Chamber of Secrets?

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1337

Awe Feck. Does this mean we donā€™t get the robo-safecrack web-cam version?

Dissapoint!

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1338

The blood wave riseth!

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1339

I would do that, but itā€™s almost as expensive as a locksmith ($200 or so for the hardware) and who knows if the safeā€™s lock is even working after all this time

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1340

Weā€™d never know until we found out. It would be another way to milk another few potential weeks of internet amusement out of this whole situation.

I mean, itā€™s looking like mid-three-figures costs will be covered, and weā€™ve been a rapt audience for nine months without any capital investment by the ringmaster. Time for some showmanship!

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1341

Safe-fest? (or Safest). Charge a line of people 5 bucks to have a go at the combination. There will be tiny commemorative safes with useless mystery junk locked inside.

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1342

Quick someone break in and open the safe

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1343

No. Someone break in and install a larger safe, weld the old one inside.

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1344

This has promise. Can we quickly repurpose the Gofundme while Rob is still on vacation?

Wait, waitā€¦ got to think inside the box here. Can we quickly build a safe around his whole house?

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1345

is his neighborhood unsafe?

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1346

That would be disappointing.

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1347

Also, what are the rules about cursed doubloons, would just Rob be cursed, or does everybody who chips in also get cursed? And what about the locksmith, does s/he get cursed as well? That wouldnā€™t seem fair.

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1348

What if that chamber also had a chamber in itā€¦

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1349

Ok, so whereā€™s the one for you not to open the safe?

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1350

And what about the locksmith, does s/he get cursed as well? That wouldnā€™t seem fair.

They knew that was part of the job when they decided not to be a baker.

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Stretch goal: make @beschizza do as heā€™s fucking told, and buy the robot to open the damn safe. Kicks in at $400.01. Go, go Invisible Hand!

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1353

Go, go Robotic Hand!

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1354

Any crowdsourced anchovy paste is to be sent to me.

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