I found a locked safe hidden at the back of a closet in my new house

I’m so exited I didn’t even notice what holiday you meant!

If you have a date, please, pretty please, do a live stream! I want to witness the creation of the new era like as if I’m there!

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Minstrel, Gambler, Roaster of Chickens, he truly is a renaissance man.

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Is the safe in the danger zone?

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No more funny stuff! As long as we keep being funny, Our Paid Employee won’t open it!

(But that was damned funny.)

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A thread? Do we need a thread?

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Is the zombie of Rob Ford preventing the safe from being opened?

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Bring me the head of Charlie Hebdo?

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Old Rob dead? Then I’m the King of the Canucks!

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How has this not been posted yet?

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And where is my tee-shirt, dammit?

*lolz

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Kids.

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:smile:

In fact, though, it’s more likely to be old-lady-brain: I was a folkie for decades, so I’m sure I knew that at some point.

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Should hire these guys

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I never knew that there was a point when Kenny Rogers was actually cool; I wasn’t born until '75 and my Gram liked all his hokey country stuff, so I thought that’s all he ever did. Live & learn.

>__<

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Position a neodyminum magnet the size of two stacked hockey pucks over the solenoid that retracts the door pins, hit smartly with shorty sledgehammer. Be sure to wrap the magnets with a great deal of tape since you might have to hit them hard enough to shatter. If the tape is nice and slippy you won’t leave a single mark anywhere on the safe, it’ll just be “magically” opened.

Will not work on Rob’s safe, or rather, it might work, but would not leave the safe undamaged. The gears would be shattered or stripped since there’s no solenoid. So don’t do that, Rob.

EDIT: Oh, and you’ll need some planning to get the magnet off the safe, but if you build your wooden carrier appropriately you can use the hammer for that, too.

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Alright, I’m calling the locksmiths again today and tomorrow. I figure it’ll be open by the END OF THIS WEEK. Video will be provided

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I knew the allure of space bars would be enough to get dials-a-turnin’

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