I found a locked safe hidden at the back of a closet in my new house

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“FINALLY, AFTER THREE THOUSAND YEARS, I AM FR… oh, just a scoping hole? I see. Alright then. Back to your marks, everyone! sorry, my bad, sorry…”

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Is Geraldo on the scene?

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I’m just glad the cows are safe till next week. From what I hear they’ve been through a lot. What with all the thefts, miraculous translocations, mysterious afflictions, falls into mysterious holes, manslaughter of farmers wives due to mysticly poisoned milk and what have.

And I don’t really have the time to go a questing in the weird places to bless/cure/find them right now.

I actually intend to make use of the safe, since a bunch of crazy people paid for the damned thing to be opened! So I might know if it’s empty before it’s opened, but it will still get opened.

And really, y’all deserve a proper Geraldo moment on the small screen after all this. I actually just got a decent video camera (Sony a6500) with this among other things in mind.

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A pricey mirrorless APS-C camera with in body stabilization that is surprisingly $400 more affordable for some reason. :smiley:

Edit: Doh, and that link to Amazon is an affiliate link! Well, I guess you gotta pay for the lenses somehow…

Just in case people are suspicious of the POV shot looking out from inside the safe as the door is opened “for the first time” :wink:

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Don’t forget the lens!

(the link says “body only”)

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I’m waiting for suspiciously shaky Blair Witch Project-style footage lit with a flashlight.

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And a microphone. I don’t need audio, only a narrator standing around hyping it up like Geraldo.

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Well, Geraldo is probably available…

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Alternate theory: The discount “security technician” Rob hired needs a week to Google “how to open a safe” and watch tutorials on YouTube.

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Man, you are a Skeptic, ain’t ya?

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Kinda hard not to be in this thread :smiley:

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Holy shit, this is one LONG con just to post an affiliate camera link. That’s dedication to the craft, right there!

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It’s even more amazing when you learn that “Rob Beschizza” is a fictional character created years ago, just for this one thread.

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Doesn’t that happen automatically now?

https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B00UG9HB1Q/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1484438526&sr=8-1&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_QL65&keywords=safe&dpPl=1&dpID=41mFZ7-JjfL&ref=plSrch

Edit : yep.

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One time in a land, far away there lived a blogger named Rob…

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Hmm…

https://www.amazon.com/BlueFire-Android-Endoscope-Phones-Function/dp/B013HZCYXK/

Different affiliate. The auto affiliate link account is I see is “boing05-20” (a group account?) but Rob’s camera link is a shortened link that resolves to “bngbng-20”. Seems like a manual add since Rob had to request the shortened link rather than just copy the URL out of his browser.

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OH God! Welp, at least now Cameo’s Word Up is out of my head…

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