If Lara Croft were a man


#1

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#2

...she'd be a Korean pop star?


#3

OMG Hot!


#4

Lets be realistic. Eidos isn't a japanese company, so they wouldn't use Japanese prettyboys. It would be the totally sterotypical western slab of beef like most every shooter on the market.

I mean just look at this stereotypically Jewish face on Mr. Blazkowicz

I think it's hilarious that they made him pretty much the platonic ideal of an Aryan.


#5

It feels like a lot of people are skipping past that buried lede mentioning the reboot if Indiana Jones.

Why not just treat it like James Bond and have it just keep going? Why do we always have to reboot everything? Of course, that one with the aliens was unforgivable, maybe they should let it die on the vine...


#6

I'd play this game in a heartbeat. That was pretty damned hott.


#7

a) not Jewish.
b) kind of exactly like the original game's character... but 3d and SSS shaded.

although, they did get rid of his baby hands.


#8

I'm pretty sure that the tomb raider movies would have been much more popular had Lara been topless like Nate is in most of the pictures.


#9

Ew... They say he's dressed the same but it's so immodest without the sports bra.


#10

You think he'd be better rendered in a half shirt?


#11

What? No complaints of misandry? Yet...


#12

Not arguing your point, but Eidos is owned by Square Enix which is, in fact, a Japanese company.

On a side note, shouldn't he be wearing a too-tight tank top? I don't recall Lara Croft running around tombs topless.


#13

RIP baby hands


#14

I don't really have a preference, but the link said "same attire." His shorts are shorter than Lara's, too. I didn't even know that was possible.


#15

I don't know, the original Blazkowitz was more charismatic.


#16


#17

Eidos wasn't owned by Squeenix when they made the original Tomb Raider though.


#18

kinda reminds me of


#19

It ends up looking like gay SFW porn because it seems that most straight and gay dudes probably like the same stuff, just in their favorite flavor.


#20

He doesn't look too bad, but his hair could be longer.

(Longer hair and other flamboyant affectations of appearance are nothing more than the male's emergence from his drab camouflage into the gaudy plumage which is the birth right of his sex.)

Apologies to Ragni Gerome; Mac Dermot Arthur Terence Galt; Rado James