Poster for new Tomb Raider movie is the photoshop neckmare of 2017


#1

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2017/09/18/poster-for-new-tomb-raider-mov.html


#2

Still, useful for nabbing the youngest, greenest acacia leaves.

Also, good thing she brought her ice axe to the tropics.


#3

Who knew that Lara Croft could swallow a goat whole?


#4

At least she doesn’t have head-sized breasts, I guess


#5

yeah, agreed! i’m so ok with this in terms of photoshopped female body contortions.


#6

Ok, I’ll say it, “Deeeeeep throat!”


#7

Two high executives:

1: She has a horseneck.

2: Horses are elegant and powerful.

1: Is that what we’re going for?

2: Did we run out of the red beans and rice?

1: Stop trying to confuse me.


#8

I’m torn between a giraffe reference and an Alien one - there’s a hint of Riply’s no 1 enemy about that neck


#9

but why though, how? so many levels of wtf?
including would i have noticed it if it wasnt mentioned?


#10

Well, at least we now know the real name of the “Giraffe Neck Girl” from Sam & Max Hit The Road…


#11

Coming soon, at a chiropractitioner near you.


#12

Can we also talk about her creepily angled-back ear that seems to have come loose?

This thing is a prime Photoshop Nightmare.


#13

She looks like ET’s cousin. Maybe there’s more to Lara Croft’s backstory than we knew.


#14

Marketing Exec: ‘How can we tap into that Avatar juice without making Lara blue?’

Graphix: ‘Howzabout this - just a quick tester’

Exec: ‘Yeah! Go with it, go with it! Cameron will love it, he’ll really get it! Homage, man, homage!’

Graphix: ‘Wait, no no … where’d he go? You didn’t send him the file did you?’

From down the hall: ‘Yeah and we can develop the theme into y’know she’s an alien and have a tie-up and merch this is fuckinng great Laravatar Croft! Man I’m smart! Man oh man we nailed it today!’


#15

She was planning a polar adventure, but that would require clothing.


#16

If you were wondering what the budget for the new Tomb Raider movie is, the answer is “No.”

No - I prefer to watch a movie rather than a pile of money.

People are already polarized, so it appears to be working!


#17

I will never forget going to see the Angelia Jolie Tomb Raider movie in the theater (I had friends who really liked boobs) and laughing out loud at a scene where she treks across a Siberian wasteland on a dogsled, the camera lingering on her chest as her fur coat billowed out like a cape behind her.


#18

Do we really need another Tomb Raider movie? :thinking:


#19

Its like no one watched Edge of Tomorrow at all…


#20

Is it weird that I think that’s kinda hot?