Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2017/09/18/poster-for-new-tomb-raider-mov.html
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4 Likes
Still, useful for nabbing the youngest, greenest acacia leaves.
Also, good thing she brought her ice axe to the tropics.
27 Likes
Who knew that Lara Croft could swallow a goat whole?
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At least she doesn’t have head-sized breasts, I guess
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yeah, agreed! i’m so ok with this in terms of photoshopped female body contortions.
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Ok, I’ll say it, “Deeeeeep throat!”
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Two high executives:
1: She has a horseneck.
2: Horses are elegant and powerful.
1: Is that what we’re going for?
2: Did we run out of the red beans and rice?
1: Stop trying to confuse me.
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I’m torn between a giraffe reference and an Alien one - there’s a hint of Riply’s no 1 enemy about that neck
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but why though, how? so many levels of wtf?
including would i have noticed it if it wasnt mentioned?
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Well, at least we now know the real name of the “Giraffe Neck Girl” from Sam & Max Hit The Road…
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Can we also talk about her creepily angled-back ear that seems to have come loose?
This thing is a prime Photoshop Nightmare.
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She looks like ET’s cousin. Maybe there’s more to Lara Croft’s backstory than we knew.
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Marketing Exec: ‘How can we tap into that Avatar juice without making Lara blue?’
Graphix: ‘Howzabout this - just a quick tester’
Exec: ‘Yeah! Go with it, go with it! Cameron will love it, he’ll really get it! Homage, man, homage!’
Graphix: ‘Wait, no no … where’d he go? You didn’t send him the file did you?’
From down the hall: ‘Yeah and we can develop the theme into y’know she’s an alien and have a tie-up and merch this is fuckinng great Laravatar Croft! Man I’m smart! Man oh man we nailed it today!’
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She was planning a polar adventure, but that would require clothing.
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If you were wondering what the budget for the new Tomb Raider movie is, the answer is “No.”
No - I prefer to watch a movie rather than a pile of money.
People are already polarized, so it appears to be working!
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I will never forget going to see the Angelia Jolie Tomb Raider movie in the theater (I had friends who really liked boobs) and laughing out loud at a scene where she treks across a Siberian wasteland on a dogsled, the camera lingering on her chest as her fur coat billowed out like a cape behind her.
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Do we really need another Tomb Raider movie? 
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Is it weird that I think that’s kinda hot?
1 Like
