I heard that this year there are Satanists giving out candy that can cause type 2 diabetes.
The whole razor blade thing is, of course, an utter lie. The horrifying truth is that there are some sketchy people giving out razor handles for free, and then charging outrageous prices for the blades.
I, uh, don’t want any.
I’ll dm you my address.
One family tradition I’m happy to carry on is the candy inspection. That’s when I get to levy my taxes. I’m very clear, like my mother was with me, that the inspection is really just a toll booth for candy taxes.
Thanks, friend.
Agree. Not even the cheap edibles. But I think this year the psychos will be any parent who’s going to let their kid get candy from a bunch of people, even if you know them. How would you sanitize it? Not saying there’s a high likelihood of viral transmission but why would you take a chance?
The direction we’ve been heading we can probably expect Witch Burnings to make a big comeback soon.
For me the horror came 3-5 days later when I was reduced to eating it while bottoming out. I’ve been less demoralized as an adult licking what turned out to be cigarette ash off the edge of the coffee table.
Dude, if anyone finds the street handing out drugs plz lmk k?
Holding out hope for LSD on sugar cubes.
No way! Can you imagine some rando bingeing on edibles as if it were penny candy?
This!
And having grown up in the Nancy Reagan/DARE era, I’m super disappointed that random dealers aren’t constantly trying to hook me up with a freebie. I mean, that was supposedly how they lured you in right?
When I was a pre-teen, my 3 yrs older sis got caught up in something that involved having a cop come to the house. I think she got invited to a party and found out there was going to be weed there and narc’d it out. That would be typical of my sister. She didn’t get invited to a lot of parties anyway, and of course that was the last one. Anyhoo, the cop said that “fruit bowl parties” were all the rage, kids would raid their parents’ medicine cabinets and throw random pills in a bowl and take pills at random. It sounded like bullshit even then to 11 year old me, and I was as cop-friendly a little monster even for my white suburban upbringing. “Uh, so let me get this straight, you could get a handful of laxatives or some fatal heart medicine? And you think people do this for fun?”
Yeah, that story still goes around. I heard it again on the intersnet a while back. Cops can be dumb.
Not even that long. It’d be the house with a line of trick-or-treaters stretching down the block and around the corner!
No one is gonna burn me at the stake again!
Yeah, and if you say no they’ll just push harder. They’re really insistent about giving drugs away for free to people who insist they don’t want them.
When the middle class kids start demanding 70%+ cocoa is probably when they’ll start getting working class British Steel!
Candy apple man
Candy apple man
Candy apple…
Weird huh. So much of what we were told was just outright lies.
DARE to say no to the drug war. <- someone make this into a shirt
