Jailed gentleman holds in possible evidence-bearing poop for 40 days


#1

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2018/03/01/jailed-gentleman-holds-in-poss.html


#2

Bartleby the Suspect. “I would prefer not to.”


#3

What is his endgame here? Is there a limit to how long they can hold him on suspicion? I seem to recall past cases where people were held for years because they didn’t confess and the cops didn’t have the evidence to convict.


#4

I’m lucky if I can hold it for 40 minutes. This guy is super human…


#5

Came to post these exact words…


#6

It’s like “5 Chinese Brothers” – but instead of holding back the ocean, he’s holding in the deuce.


#7

Yeah, I’m just amazed by his fortitude unless he swallowed something that’s causing an obstruction and they haven’t realized it yet somehow. I don’t get that kind of leeway with my bowels. Past a certain point it’s not will I or won’t I… it’s just a question of where.


#8

Launcelot Gobbo. […] but at the length truth will out.


#9

On a good day.


#10

What an impactful story!


#11

In the Nazi camps, prisoners were forced to hold in their poop (even with the little food they were given). If they pooped, they got beaten or shot. It was a cruel game the guards would play.


#12

tumblr_p4vs76jFUR1qeh4gao1_540


#13

Like today…


#14

RandyPoop


#15

Shouldn’t he have died by now?!


#16

https://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=https%3A%2F%2Fpmcvariety.files.wordpress.com%2F2014%2F11%2Fmule.jpg%3Fw%3D1000%26h%3D563%26crop%3D1&imgrefurl=http%3A%2F%2Fvariety.com%2F2014%2Ffilm%2Freviews%2Ffilm-review-the-mule-1201363181%2F&docid=LrH2sN0ryNTM_M&tbnid=G5psP-PKaF39MM%3A&vet=10ahUKEwiv_7vX6cvZAhXIslQKHUR6AvMQMwhAKAEwAQ..i&w=1000&h=563&client=opera&bih=754&biw=1536&q=australian%20movie%20drug%20mule&ved=0ahUKEwiv_7vX6cvZAhXIslQKHUR6AvMQMwhAKAEwAQ&iact=mrc&uact=8


#17

Just the context is funny as hell. Thanks.


#18

This almost seems impossible. Is he also on a hunger strike? They don’t mention that. What goes in must come out. It’s almost like he is defying the laws of physics.


#19

“The men in uniform alleged I swallowed some quantity of hemp. My shit was sent for lab test. Result: negative. Which brings us to… Expensive Shit.”


#20

I have a rather slow system, but I couldn’t fathom how one could forgo 40 days? All cheese diet?