Jailed gentleman holds in possible evidence-bearing poop for 40 days


Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2018/03/01/jailed-gentleman-holds-in-poss.html


Bartleby the Suspect. “I would prefer not to.”


What is his endgame here? Is there a limit to how long they can hold him on suspicion? I seem to recall past cases where people were held for years because they didn’t confess and the cops didn’t have the evidence to convict.


I’m lucky if I can hold it for 40 minutes. This guy is super human…


Came to post these exact words…


It’s like “5 Chinese Brothers” – but instead of holding back the ocean, he’s holding in the deuce.


Yeah, I’m just amazed by his fortitude unless he swallowed something that’s causing an obstruction and they haven’t realized it yet somehow. I don’t get that kind of leeway with my bowels. Past a certain point it’s not will I or won’t I… it’s just a question of where.


Launcelot Gobbo. […] but at the length truth will out.


On a good day.


What an impactful story!


In the Nazi camps, prisoners were forced to hold in their poop (even with the little food they were given). If they pooped, they got beaten or shot. It was a cruel game the guards would play.




Like today…




Shouldn’t he have died by now?!




Just the context is funny as hell. Thanks.


This almost seems impossible. Is he also on a hunger strike? They don’t mention that. What goes in must come out. It’s almost like he is defying the laws of physics.


“The men in uniform alleged I swallowed some quantity of hemp. My shit was sent for lab test. Result: negative. Which brings us to… Expensive Shit.”


I have a rather slow system, but I couldn’t fathom how one could forgo 40 days? All cheese diet?