Japanese astronaut who's grown 3-1/2 inches in space hopes he'll fit in vehicle that takes him back home

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2018/01/09/japanese-astronaut-whos-grow.html

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I feel your pain Norishige Kanai.

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SoooBig

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Note to NASA: Remove ‘Tropic of Cancer’ from ISS library.

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My God. What if he can’t fit… and he’s forced to stay there growing and growing like a houseplant until he looks like a Guild Steersman or something?

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Astronauts! They grow up so fast, don’t they? It seems like just a few weeks ago he was toddling off to his launch.

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Is it permanent? If so, this gives me yet another good reason to get my ass to space!

Never mind the Soyuz, what about his apartment back home?

This is what happens when you source the ISS’ water supply from Fangorn Forest.

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Saruman was the lowest bidder…

(In Tolkein’s universe, he was defeated, but in this one he soon made an alliance with KochBro. Some hired mercenary Martian Fighting Machines made short work of the Ents with their heat rays, and after that Saruman naturally transitioned into the aerospace business.)

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Seems he retracted the statement

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Turns out astronauts cannot use tape measures.

d4ca3e11d30531fab2ed261621726640--top-gear-cars-jeremy-clarkson

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3-1/2 inches “down there?”

Assuming that growth spurts in space are global in nature. :grin:

No, it’s mostly just spinal decompression. (There’s some swelling and fluid redistribution, too, but also not permanent.) Ride a horse at canter for a couple hours and I’m sure it’ll all pack back down again.

Perhaps someday zero-G will replace traction as postoperative recovery therapy?

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Simple misunderstanding. It turns out that he’s pretty much the same size he was when he got there but the entire International Space Station has been gradually shrinking.

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It would be tricky to get said patient into orbit without causing further trauma from the high G-forces of a rocket launch. Easier to float them in a saline tank.