Originally published at: Jesus Appoints Mike Johnson as Moses
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I think Mike Johnson got really hammered and watched Evan Almighty.
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Or really, really high just before speaking.
I feel like maybe we should be a tad concerned that the person second in line to the presidency has many late night conversations with an invisible friend, and those conversations are full of delusions of grandeur.
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I know it is bad form to speculate on people’s mental health; but, for fuck’s sake, either this guy is a liar or delusional.
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Sounds like pretty typical evangelical christian fraudster-speak to me.
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Which simply proves, yet again, that one has to be either (a) not acting in good faith or (b) delusional to be part of the MAGA GOP.
There has always been these hucksters and nutjobs but with the new influx of dark money after Citizens United they’re now being promoted to poison the well by those that want to ruin democracy and act as new kings.
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“I hear voices in my head”
“Yeah buddy, most people just call them ‘thoughts’.”
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Hopefully, it means you’re going to lead your followers into the wilderness for forty years.
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It was only true once.
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jesus christ …
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Cool story, Bro.
Jesus Built My Hotrod.
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What’s the worst that could happen?
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I wonder if Johnson’s son got any alerts on his phone at about the same time he had this “revelation”.
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Honestly earlier speculation of him being ripped to the tits, off his gourd, banjaxed and bollixed seems on point. This guy is fucking blitzed on Stukapillen.
Sure he may be an abstemious porn abstaining hardcore Christian but…
Enivrer vous!
Il fait etre joujours ivre
Mais de quoi? De vin, de poésie, ou de vertu à votre guise, mais enivrez-vous!
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‘We’re coming to a Red Sea moment.’
‘What does that mean, Lord?’
Split the republican part into 2! Twice as mush influence 
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The orange one?
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I believe in God, but I also believe God has bigger things on their plate than speaking to politicians about procedural stuff in Washington.
Something else I don’t understand is why someone would believe him when he says Jesus spoke to him but if Pelosi said the same thing she would be dragged through the mud.
What are the rules to believe someone spoke to Jesus vs. no, no you didn’t.
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“Why yes, I talk to invisible men. And yes, I am Speaker of the House of Representatives. What of it…?”
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Time for another motion to vacate the chair, on the grounds that the current occupant is hearing voices from an invisible friend?
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