Judge freezes Alex Jones's assets

That horse has already bolted into a bunch of shelf companies hasn’t it?

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Yeah we wish!

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Or as we call them: proctologists, because you can’t hide shit from them.

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He went a little overboard following Tucker Carlson’s tanning regimen, didn’t he?

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Followed by more prison.

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I chalk this up to a lifetime of not getting caught for anything, or easily getting out of it if they do. When you’ve never had real consequences for misbehaviour, you stop worrying about it, I guess.

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With some prison sprinkles and an extra-thick, double prison shake?

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Nope-put him solitary and feed him the loaf. I bet he sheds those extra pounds in a hurry.

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“This is a sponging house, Mr Jones, better food depends on you disgorging more assets”

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I’m pretty sure that money has been gone. He’ll just have to leave the country to spend it.

After telegraphing intentions to hide assets from his ex-wife during his divorce, I am pretty certain his finances have been under a microscope for years before this lawsuit.

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