Jupiter is the Death Star



“All these worlds are yours except Europa. Keep your distance there, but don’t look like you’re trying to keep your distance.”


That blast came from the Death Star! That thing’s operational!

1 Like

It’s the sun that didn’t make it…most solar systems have been found to be binary; if it’d become a sun…welll, maybe Pluto would still be a planet, and habitable to boot!

1 Like

So somewhere under Jupiter’s clouds there’s a trash compactor with a dianoga living in it?

(I should probably seek professional help for knowing the term for that thing without even looking it up.)


It was the second planet I ever saw through a telescope as a child. Ha, I’m glad it isn’t a star and remains so pretty :smile:

(When I later saw the rings of Saturn, mind. Blown.)


That’s no gas giant…it’s a space station

It’s too big to be a death star…


It had a name?

Get help. :wink:

1 Like

It probably has an extensive back story and an entire EU novel devoted to it.


In fact there was reportedly a bonus feature on a recent release that explained exactly why a vicious animal was in the sanitation system in the first place.


I still have the vinyl full album with “Other Galactic Funk” bought when I was but a teeny-teen, lol…and fun trivia: Jon Bon Jovi’s uncle worked extensively on the album!

1 Like

I ran the numbers long ago, and found if Jupiter was big enough to become a class M star, it would make no noticeable difference on Earth. Not only would it not give us toasty winter nights - it wouldn’t even be much brighter than it already is. Red dwarf stars just don’t amount to much. Also, I think it would need to be a lot bigger, not just a skosh. Fiction is so much more fun without all that math.

1 Like

Parasites in that location make perfect sense.

1 Like

Oh okay…see, what I knew, without ever really looking up new evidence, LOL, was found in an old Time-Life book published in 1955 called “The World We Live In”. Thanks bunches for info, it gives me something to look up when I have free time! :smile:

Please tell me that this is why Bon Jovi debuted on the Star Wars Holiday Special! [I think I’ve got that right…]

1 Like

Great! Now how am I going to remember the names of seven planets?! I had just gotten used to “My Very Educated Mother Just Showed Us Nothing”. Which planet goes out next?

See Rule 34.


1 Like

That really puts the “ewww” in EU.

1 Like