Lance Armstrong says he would never cheat at golf

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Mulligan.

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I can think of somewhere Lance Armstrong could stick his golf clubs.

Just fuck off, Lance.

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Man I shaved strokes all the time off my golf scores. I sucked so, so badlyā€¦

I think I understand what he is saying, it probably feels pretty good to have a sense of accomplishment without it being diluted by negative feelings of cheating, lying, and intimidation.

But how he said it reminds me he is a competitive, A Type, sociopath that will likely cheat at golf when he gets the chance. Itā€™s just in his nature to win and have no feelings of remorse on how he did it or who he hurt.

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The disgraced cyclist, who admitted using performance-enhancing drugs on his way to seven Tour de France wins, says he is drawn to crying Wolf because of its deep code of honor.

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I wonder whether the difference is that between being a professional and an amateur rather than the sport per se.

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I love adhering to a code of honor that we in cycling didnā€™t have.

But, since he was so good at cheatingā€¦ he went with what he was naturally good at.

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Ah, the ever-entertaining squirming of the exposed sociopath. This is the kind of person who would try to murder you, then when caught call it a misunderstanding. Anyway, it wasnā€™t his fault, it was cyclingā€™s fault for being so dirty. Bad cycling, get away from me! Iā€™m going to play golf.
We can at least be thankful that every time a high profile assclown like this is exposed the general level of public knowledge about the nature of sociopathic narcissism is increased.

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I smell a caddyshack reboot!

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Well, cycling was wide open doping since, well, forever, really. At least since Benzedrine hit the market. Lance was really good at it, and really good at riding. Sure, strip his tittle, but who should have any tittle from when ever they banned such things until today? Some sports, cheating is normal (say, Superbike in the 1970s in the USA, or do you think BMW made bikes with what looked like a stock exhaust, but had no muffler inside? It was said that if you could make a stock bike finish, you could protest your way to first place).

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Itā€™s possible that he is expressing the intermediate position, that it feels pretty good to have a sense of accomplishment in an area where people assume that lying, cheating, and intimidation werenā€™t involved. (suckers!) Very pragmatic.

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The guy has been ā€“ in terms of career, income, endorsements, public regard ā€“ about as disgraced as any athlete out there. I do not get the impulse to beat the guy when heā€™s down. He did everything he could to lie and cheat and (in lying and cheating) steal from the world. But he got caught and his life is as different as could be.

I donā€™t know about the rest of you, but when Iā€™ve had a career set-back, Iā€™ve had to do some soul searching to find a path forward. Some of that is in just dealing with what you might have done better, but the lionā€™s share of that is trying to strip down to the parts of you that are still the good parts of you and rebuild from a different foundation. Sure, the guy is ā€“ probably always will be ā€“ a world class prick. But Iā€™ve always thought of the American concept of ā€œthe Pursuit of Happinessā€ to be, in effect, ā€œThe Right to Get Your Shit Back Together.ā€ Heā€™s trying. Heā€™s got a long way to go. And if in telling himself that golf has rules that he needs to abide by, he can construct a falsework on which to rebuild a life, then Iā€™ll let the man be.

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I vaguely recall reading about one of the Tours de France in which the author proposed stripping accolades from a rather deep fieldā€“something like fifteen of the top twenty finishers that yearā€“, as to punish Armstrong was to only scratch the surface of the doping problem.

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How does one cheat at golf? Being athletic? Carrying oneā€™s own equipment? Actually walking from one part of the manicured lawn to the next?

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2005?

No 1st, no 3rd, and 2nd, 4th, 5th, 6th, 7th, 9th all had subsequent suspensions.

ETA: that wasnā€™t even the worst one.

https://uk.eurosport.yahoo.com/blogs/blazin-saddles/really-won-tours-lance-153516263.html

What heā€™s saying is that it wasnā€™t HIS fault he cheated. It was totally every one elseā€™s fault. Everyone else was cheating, you see. He didnā€™t do anything wrong. They MADE him cheat.

Thatā€™s what heā€™s saying. Heā€™s so full of shit.

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ā€œand his life is as different as could be.ā€

Uh, how? Exactly, how? Heā€™s still playing sports, heā€™s still rich, heā€™s still making money. Seems like itā€™s pretty much the same. Oh boooooo hoooooh, rich guy gets caught cheating and now people donā€™t believe he wonā€™t be a cheater forever. Waahaaaah.

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How does one cheat at golf?

I know it was mostly a joke, but it made me realize there are lots of ways to cheat at golf. After all, the boss or client needs to win even if heā€™s incompetent. A little toss of the ball here or there, count shaving, tapping the ball into the cup as a gimme, dropping a new ball instead of actually finding one you hitā€¦ and of course mulligans are institutionalized cheating and thereā€™s the equipment arms race for ā€˜legalā€™ but hardly honorable advantage. None of this matter when youā€™re just playing for fun and have beer. But the honorā€™s an illusion, especially if youā€™re Lance Armstrong.

Cā€™mon, doping (and all the other performance enhancement technologies) is the most interesting part on the pro sports. Fascinating overlap of medicine, biochemistry, forensics, and several other fields, recently even including genetics.

Who ends up first in a given race is about the least interesting aspect.

So why all the brouhaha?

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