Man arrested for donut flakes that cop insisted was meth


Originally published at:


Jesus… The popo really need to quit doing this shit.
And looks like being white does not get you out of things, well okay he didn’t get killed.


Smart move for anyone, even (as this story shows), people not doing anything illegal.


Could the promulgation of these “roadside test” kits be fueled by the same kind of political maneuvering that led to all those fake bomb detectors in Iraq?



As a general rule I never cooperate with or volunteer information to authority figures beyond the absolute minimum required by law or contract.

You can not automatically trust the motives of anyone who sought out a position giving them authority over others.


Man arrested for donut flakes that cop insisted was meth
They're the same thing!


If you’ve ever eaten a Krispy Kreme donut anywhere you know how hard it is to get rid of those glaze crumbs. I had a chair I finally just threw away. The glaze crumbs that fell between my legs left a rather suspicious looking mark.


That recent NYT article about the use of roadside drug detection kits resulting in poor people routinely pleading guilty - when the tests, even when they’re administered correctly (which they often are not) has a huge false positive rate (that they know about) - was pretty depressing. People’s lives are being destroyed because of bullshit tests and the lack of funds to challenge them, even though it’s a known fact that the tests are bullshit. On top of which, “eagle eyed” cops are on the lookout for anything even vaguely white and powdery/flakey/crystalized that they can grab people for, drug test or no.


Some details I think our Dear Readers™ may have missed.

  1. Said he was 64 and retired. Standard retirement age is 65. Clearly a red flag. Probably retired early from the drug trade and as shoe boxes of cash at home under the floor.

  2. Picked up a “church friend”. Pretty sure that is drug slang for a supplier. Maybe not as retired as he stated?

  3. No 64 year old I know would let you eat anything, much less a donut known for leaving sticky flakes everywhere, in their car. My grandparents wouldn’t allow anything other than water consumed in their Oldsmobiles.

  4. Officer was already “on the lookout for drug activity”. This means it was a high drug area. Why would a “retired, church going” 64 year old be in a high drug area?

  5. Took place in Florida. Have you read the crazy shit that happens in Florida? BB alone chronicles weird happenings going on all the time. I would treat each encounter with a suspicion level of 11.


When a cop can’t recognize donut sugar, what is the world coming to? Don’t they even teach them the basics any more?


I just lick them off the floor or wherever they land. They’re too good/addictive to let them go to waste.


The addition of the substance to be tested is an optional step in a “roadside test”





Wait, what? How does that work? Faith?


That is a good rule in theory, though in practice it works out better for white people. “Failure to cooperate” can be a death sentence if you have too much melanin in your skin (and sometimes even if you don’t).


I wasn’t arrested but my Karmann Ghia back in 1989 was pulled over for I don’t know what, and the cops said they saw a “green leafy substance” in the car and asked to search it. Since I didn’t smoke pot and hadn’t had anyone in my car who did, I let them. They showed it to me, didn’t write a ticket and let me go.


“You mean all these years the boys at the evidence room were just selling me regular donuts?? THEY SWORE THOSE WERE THE METH KIND, DAMMIT!”


He got lucky. The lab could have faked it.

They are going to remember all of this like Salem witch trials and the burning of witches in Europe. America has become a depressing, crushing, murderous nightmare.

The best thing we can do is repeal as many laws as possible, empty the jails, and fire the police, the judges, and the prosecutors. They have become an autoimmune disease that is killing the host. They are monsters.


Bad cop. No Doughnut!