How is it this fine specimen didn’t earn the honor of being called a “gentleman” in the headline?
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he is a gentlemartian, clearly
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In such situations, the order is treated as having been made by one or more of Alexander Hamilton, Ulysses S. Grant, and Benjamin Franklin(depending on the size of the order) on behalf of a dependent female.
If they don’t pay cash, the appropriate corporate person is deemed to be acting as a male relative or guardian in the transactional context.
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Man claims he is going to forever be a bachelor…
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Wow. That sounds very… Saudi.
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I didn’t specifically have them in mind; but I suppose that it is pretty tricky to attempt to turn both god and mammon to 11 without sounding like one of the world’s reactionary-but-totally-loaded, a population that the various dystopian petrostates have produced quite a few of.
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So…is he not admitting that he didn’t read no book by John Gray?
Maybe he’s from the Mars Candy Bar Company. Willy Wonka was kind of eccentric too.
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There is basically no chance that he meant Mars, PA is there?
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Oh, it’s still doable, but the consequences for the doers have probably changed from previous centuries.
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If I were a woman I’d go out of my way to tell him in no uncertain terms to never, ever go fuck himself.
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I’m pretty sure I know some woman who don’t take no orders from no man.
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His mother is shaking her head yep.
It takes a long time for Martian news to reach Earth.
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It also looks like some pretty hefty segments for one guy to lift up onto a flatbed by himself. I wouldn’t try doing it alone unless I were a lot burlier, and even then I’d want a lifting belt. Not that a flatbed is the right way to haul that stuff, but it probably got on there via a Bobcat or something to begin with.
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In just two millennia we’ve gone from Give me a lever, and I shall move the world (Archimedes) to Give me a loader and I can haul away your dead tree then lose it all over East Detroit and bail (Ihor Stetkewycz). How far we’ve fallen 
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It could be worse. “Give me a leverage and I shall buy the subprime world” is the rule of the day…
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I suppose better dead wood than more robo-evicted homeowners on the streets of Detroit.
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Matt Damon!
So Alpha!
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