Man very excited about his pet venus fly trap catching prey

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2020/11/20/man-very-excited-about-his-pet-venus-fly-trap-catching-prey.html

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Obligatory

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Or in this guys case “Lil Shop of Hoes”

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Okay, Zoomer.

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I wrote to kew gardens in london and they said it was illegal to own a venus
here in the uk

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Are you sure? You can buy them from Homebase.

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whatever… people are pretty strict… for anything these days…
anyhow I’d like to know how to keep them…

let alone some bushes you buy for next to nothing as ornaments…

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The cgi in this video is really good, but if you pause and zoom in right as the trap closes, you can just make out Jeff Goldblum’s face.

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Dude, I am with him. If I had one that would be the whole point of getting one.

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The narration is so perfect. Basically the next Morgan Freeman.

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The owner of the plant.

ygorlikee_9296

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I’ve written a song called “Scraping for a Sound” about homicidal spider mating rituals, a seductive Venus flytrap and her victims and a scary scrap collector building seductive drum kits (or so he believes). This is the second verse.

There is a Venus flytrap dominates my flower bed
Easy on the eye, but rather vile, it must be said
A diva during daytime, a criminal by night
She has designs on wanton flies that whet her appetite
She leads ’em on when they are young, oozing her perfume
On her tacky landing strip they always meet their doom
Helplessly they wriggle, to her belly they descend
She eats up every flyboy – they come to a sticky end

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On the audio I hear the very definition of “squee” at 32 sec. Then after the video finishes “help me, help me”.

Don’t do that. It’s bad for the plant.

So, what does Venus fly trap taste like?

Call this number to scream into the phone so we can get your phone number… sounds like a perfect marketing ploy to to update cold call lists

You’re supposed to scream in a different thread. This one’s for eating bugs.

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Fucken incel got bad vocabulary. Plus he all into plants WTF?